Bittersweet Candy Bowl

This is completely off-topic for this forum, but honestly, this is something which worries me. I’ve always been curious about it, but it is a difficult question to ask in a way that won’t make people think you are crazy.

The way I experience the world, I’m seeing and doing things, but in my head, I’m not only thinking about what is going on in the present, but also running another “process”, so to speak, in the background at pretty much all times - thinking about random things. I often spend this time daydreaming, coming up with stories, mostly self-centered, about the future. Battles, loves, drama, situations, settings, scientific discoveries… these all play out in my head near constantly. I spend many, many hours every day thinking about this, adding to the multiple continuities (or really, single resetting continuity) in my head. Talking about the details of that is irrelevant… it is more the constant daydreaming which is at issue.

When I’m not thinking about that, I’m often thinking about other things - possible inventions, why things work the way they do, how things might be related or caused by each other, things like that. This often drifts into daydreaming, but far from always, and I often have a good think.

My question is, more or less, whether other people experience the world in this way. Are you constantly thinking about not only the present but also what else could be, what else might be? Do you constantly have multiple processes running simultaneously in your head? Or when you think about something, are you only thinking about that one thing?

I’m not sure if I can adequately describe the sensation of this, but hopefully, people will grasp what I’m getting at.

It always worries me that this is very uncommon, perhaps unique, but I really have no way to gauge that and I feel uncomfortable asking others because telling them that most of the time I am thinking about not just what I’m working on but other things as well is offensive because I’m not paying attention to them - I am, but I’m always doing more than just one thing upstairs (well, almost - sometimes I will totally focus on a task like reading or writing, which allows me to do so extremely quickly).

Maybe the best way to describe it is that I don’t have to think about thinking.

Thoughts? Am I insane, or is this just a common thing no one ever talks about because it is weird?

i dunno about anyone else but it sounds pretty normal to me..

i come up with some crazy stories in my head sometimes

i’ve even written songs,just haven played them lol im so horrible at the guitar

i daydream alot so…yea,it sounds normal to me,either that or im also crazy

most of the time i think about different things quickly not exactly at the same time…

too damn much think not enough action for me’s

I tend to think as illogically as possible.

im illogically delicious, and thinking right now

Well, it is difficult to know if you are crazy - after all, if you know you’re crazy, would you really be crazy, or would you be sane because you are aware of your own situation?

I’m glad it sounds normal, though - it means at least some other people think this way. My fear is because I don’t really see thought processes like this being referenced, and it worries me because it makes me feel like it isn’t a common thing.

I don’t think there is such a thing as thinking too much, Taeshi. I LIKE that I am constantly thinking; it keeps me entertained, and even if my mental stories are not the best, they are good enough to keep me moving and keep me striving for more and more. I too sometimes have the thing where I’ll randomly think about something embarassing in the past (often something which ISN’T really, but which embarrassed me deeply at the time for no real reason and continues to do so) and feel bad. But in general, I don’t focus on negative things, and think mostly positively. I am not depressive at all though - indeed, I THINK I’m highly mentally stable. At least I like to think so.

I wonder if depression is everything reminding you of bad things, thus preventing you from seeing anything else? oo

@ Goldwulf: Well, its easy to think a lot, and much harder to act. At least for me anyway. Acting really requires that you step outside of the norm, I think, especially when doing something offbeat or out of routine.

Yeah, pretty much experience this. Instead of thinking of the past or even the present, I always seem to be thinking about the future. It’s scary at times because I can really picture them happening, and maybe that’s why I don’t really do anything bad or dreadful because I can already picture or imagine where it will be going. I sometimes even talk to myself either by thought or accidentally aloud.

Tha happens to me too. I’m constantly thinking about anything, anywhere, anywho, always imagining different situations and outcomes about everything that happens to me.

I used to think that I was just a guy that thought a lot, and that was good. Now I see it more like a curse. Much of my day is wasted in thinking about stuff that don’t have any meaning or influence. I keep thinking about what I would want to do, how better things would be if they happened like this, what I must do to be better, but it’s just thinking and in the end I find myself in the same place as in the beggining, not a sinlge step in any direction.

On the other side, when I stop thinking that much and focus in the present, I can see and hear things that I normaly don’t perceive, the answers to my problems come much easier and I can do stuff that normaly I don’t have the time to do.


If you are thinking about where are you going to be without knowing where you are now, you won’t know how to take the next step.

I’m always thinking about more stuff than I should. Constantly jumping from one moped of though to the next (They’re seldem long enough to be trains). It’s mostly an issue when I’m talking to people, as I am always double and tripple guessing everything I say out of a pathalogical fear of making people hate me.

Not entirely sure what causes it. But it’s my greatest day to day fear, and the thought that takes up the most real estate on my mind.

My thought process completly prevents me from being able to complete puzzles. I’m not entirely sure why but I can’t for example get even one side of a Rubik’s cube despite a very long and concentrated effort on my part. Accursed Rubik’s Cube…

I think to the point I can’t stop unless my mind is occupied with music. Keeps me up for an extra several hours. Sucks when I’m almost asleep then something snaps my mind back to reality >.>

I find myself pacing when I’m deep in thought xD

Huh. I spend most of my free time thinking. I hear and analyse up to several songs in my head, I contemplate philosophical, religious and political questions, I run explanations and arguments (I never use them anywhere but in my head) through my brain over and over, I consider different ways of articulating myself through writing. Not only that; I, too, am constantly reminded of stupid things I’ve said and done, and I cringe at the thought of them. Sometimes I even cringe at things I never did, but that I came close to doing.

The fact that most of it happens at the same time doesn’t really help it. But hey, it’s actually quite fun, I think.

So yes, Titanium, I often feel the same way as you do. I suspect a lot of people spend a lot of time pondering. But they never talk about it because they fear their own thoughts. Either that, or we’re a special breed of humans. Homo sapiens sapiens sapiens? ^_^

The only time I don’t think is when I go with my gut instinct on a decision. Or when I talk.

Otherwise, I think so much that I actually have to take pills to stop me from thinking if I want to sleep or work on something.

Ah, overthinking, I do this either due to my extreme impatience or perhaps this is what leads to my extreme impatience.

Often times it helps and hinders in a thought process. When I need to come up with an idea I can think about it in like 12 different fashions while dreaming of something else. Of course this means when I need to focus on something I’ll often drift off. Ironically I need background noise to focus then.

So, I think (hah) that most people do work in this fashion. Either all of us are crazy or perfectly normal.

*The Ninja sits and contemplates. He is not contemplating anything in particular, but several things at once. Do most people feel that their life is nothing more than a balance between their desire to be a goody-two-shoes and the temptation to be a complete asshole? Would my sensei find out if I told these people my real identity? Should I tell these people what I normally think about, or could that be used against me? Should I post a topic about my artwork, even though most of it sucks and is non-BCB stuff? Would they find my pathetic attempts at a comic funny or stupid? Can I think of anything else to put up here? Is this part too long yet? The last one is a definite “yes”.*

I tend to be thinking 24-7 (if you count dreaming that is). Sometimes about how I might insert a character of my own in a story that I like, other times about how to improvise weapons from things around me.

For instance, right now I’m trying to figure out how to design a self-lighting Molotov Cocktail. My best plan so far is to use a bit of firework fuse to link the rag at the top to a percussion cap strapped to the side, but I need some way to keep a thumb tack suspended above the primer. That way, instead of having to fiddle with matches, you can just tap your improvised bomb against a hard surface to light it. And it wouldn’t be too hard to build either. Hideously ineffective against modern armies, but pretty useful against terrorists or zombies or what have you. Not that I’d ever make one….. well I might, just to see how well it’d work…. but I’d never use it, it’s too noisy and attention-drawing, two things Ninjas don’t like.

Other times I’ll be thinking about things like making a garden sculpture that looks like the top of a submarine and then dig it into the front lawn to make it look as if a subterrine (subterranean just doesn’t have the same ring to it) has surfaced there.

So about one-half random genius and one-half total idiocy, and I have trouble telling them apart sometimes.

PS The Ninja stuff is pretty much instinct at this point and doesn’t require any thought.

I tend to think like an idiot alot about irrelevent things hence my name
but if i realise it,does that make me not an idiot?

No, but it does give you an edge. The rest of us are idiots without knowing. ^_^

Nah. It’s not weird. I mean, we’re all weirdos in this world, aren’t we? And we all see the world differently. It’d be boring otherwise if we all thought the same. This was one of the things that helped me realize I’m not alone…

Anyways, sometimes I just wonder what it’d be like to be the person directly opposite of me at the moment. The idea of someone always being exactly opposite of me excites me. Like, the guy who is impossible for me to meet.

Other times, I just think about how fragile “reality” is and how it could change any second. Like, at any second the computer screen could sprout several horns and devour me whole as I slowly metamorphose into a tiny seed that will be expelled from the beast’s body and become a new person.

Other times, like you, I’ll just ponder how something works… and this also causes me to question the delicate balance of life. Like, how at any minute, the knife set across the kitchen could come flying at me and I’d be stabbed and then cut into several tiny pieces and eaten by my dog.

Anyways, I don’t think of anyone as weird. Because weird is the norm.

Most people think more often than you’d think.

I mostly recount old sins and the insignificance of my existence.

@TheNoun: …insignificance? Do you realize that WITHOUT your existence the entire world would be irrevocably changed! We could have all succumbed to an early zombie apocalypse if it wasn’t for you! It is a little something called the butterfly effect. Well…That and the law of unintended consequences.

Also, why worry about your past mistakes?

without you theNoun,ninjas comment wouldnt exist,and neither would mine

I don’t like to talk about this because it’s hard for people to believe but…..









I’m a pilot for Getter Robo. I totally know that without myself and the rest of the team we’d succumb to the tyranny of the Mechasaur Empire, but I don’t want to flaunt it over people. In one way we all have our giant monsters to fight. Some overcome them with deep personal strength and faith, I use Getter Rays.

And that would have altered the space-time continuum and caused Taeshi to stop drawing comics! YOU JUST SAVED BCB!!!!!

i think about alot, like carboard boxes, bits of string, cheese
i think about cheese a hell of a lot
every time i think about something i probably shouldnt (like…porn during math) i default to ” hey look! cheese” then proceed to go off on my favorite type, Bree cheese

ah, it’s ammazing texture, it’s great taste, i love it.

My last comment was directed at Idiot, but for some reason it won’t let me edit it to make that clear!

>:0

I think.
I think a lot.
It feels like I can see everything in the world.
But it feels like the world’s avoiding me.
I see, hear and read all this drama, tragedy and wonders that people feel.
And yet here I am, not feeling a thing.
I don’t have the courage to take risks, yet I always envision something more.
To me, I’m just observing life.
I was usually the silent kind of guy, tagging along the back and making moments awkward.
I craved for acceptance and feared rejection.
But I could never really get close to anyone.
Never made a true bond, and always having second thoughts.
I channel all my desires, my wishes, and my true nature through my art and to the online community.
I can speak, but either choose to be quiet or was interupted.
On paper, I can gather my thoughts correctly and release the stress.

Maybe you should try a slightly more social hobby to build self-confidence.

That’s why I decided to become a Ninja. It turned out to be harder to do than I thought, but years of difficult
training have made me the Elite Ninja that I am today.

Ninjutsu is… social? ^_^

Ved - you sound like what I worry I’ll become. Its important to remember that most barriers are self-imposed and that you can, if you want to, step outside of your self-appointed role. You’ll probably find people like you more than you believe, incidentally.

As for not feeling anything, I have to admit that I often am fairly emotionless, and for many, many years I was very stoic. I have emotions, but I sometimes suspect that some of them are actually “secondhand” emotions - basically, I built them out of the expectations of others.

I don’t feel sad when people die in real life, for example. People I’ve known have died, and I’ve never felt sad. Not even once. I pretended to because it was useful for social interaction and not mourning is utterly unacceptable from a social standpoint, but I really didn’t feel anything. I suspect I’d feel a bit more if it was someone I actually cared about…

Which is another thing. I care about very few people. I don’t love my kin; I don’t feel anything for them. Again, I pretend to because it is useful and because it would hurt them if I didn’t (which would be inconvenient for me), but the reality is that I really don’t care about them. Most likely, they will never know because I will keep it hidden. but it is so.

But yeah…

Honestly, you should just say hello and act friendly towards someone you think could be useful. Its really not a risk; people seldom act negatively towards people who are friendly.

Well, I do think a lot as well.

I always keep thinking about what could’ve happened had I done something differently, and I usually take hours in that path of thought. My mind also seems to divide in two parts whenever I’m to take a decision: Logical and emotional. They tend to argue a lot.

And then there come random thoughts… I just lost the game.

Well, Titanium, we’re utilitarianists, aren’t we? ^_^

@Titanium
I suppose I could.
Generally I just say hi, but never really engage into connversations.
Except at the lunch table where everyone is either talking about pokemon or “gay is an irrelevant term cause gay is actually straight and lesbian is gay”
…I dunno what goes through their heads, too much South Park I guess. xD

For me to be social with my community is a lot harder than to be social here, I’ll give you that.

Ah, thinking.

For me, I think far too much. I have a tendency to over-analyse past situations to the point of obsessing over them. I tend to depress myself fairly often over those things.

I’ve always found the “insanity” thing to be a bit fascinating, since its always hard to tell yourself whether or not you are truly crazy. Of course, there is the slight detail of the fact that I started a conversation on whether or not “normal” truly exists and managed to convince my little brother (who isn’t “little&rdquo and father that it doesn’t exist by stating that normal is based on one’s view on the world and that your view of “normal” can easily be radically different than another persons take on normal. (normal to a cop is vastly different than normal tnot one for small talk to be honest.

And oh gawd South Park. Ugh.
Idiocy and being a jerk are sure fire ways to piss me off and that o an account) Also that kinda resulted in the fact that normal no longer exists, everything is considered weird/strange. So yeah…I have way too much time on my hands.

I’ve also kept myself up for hours on end at night by simply going over and over future events that may or may not take place. I’ve also spent the time daydreaming (or would it be “nightdreaming” since that takes place long after 1 am XP) entire worlds and what would go on. It’s both entertaining, and annoying as heck.

The ability to play back entire songs in your head is a useful ability, no? I’ve done that many times during a boring lecture by my parents.

Naw, thinking too much is a good think, far as I’m concerned. It’s a useful ability.

That, and you catch so much more things than the average person does.

The only problem is that its really freaking hard to find people who think in a similar manner. I have difficulty holding a conversation with some people simply because I grow bored of it. I LOVE to bounce ideas off of people and talk about current events. I’m show ALWAYS winds up giving me a massive headache as a result.

Also, for the heck of it, try and figure some of today’s games logic. When ya get down to it, many of them simply fall to pieces. Then again, they are games, so I’ve often let that slide. XD

And for the heck of it, I’m still apparently a massive pokemon nerd. I just managed to find my Crystal version after I lost it about a year ago. 8D *goes to play it*

EDIT: …And here I thought I had typed up a small post. |D

I have a focused mind. i don’t think about what i’m not doing right now.

this means that i can’t remember birthdays and apear to be selfish. i’m not really but when i’m bussy thrn thats all i can think about.

Why do the posts everyone puts here seem so depressing? Am I the only one who notices this trend? What happened to all the cynically happy people like me?

I thought the use of my regular smiley face would show my state of perpetual happiness. ^_^

Really, for the past 4 or 5 years I can’t think (sic) of one single time I haven’t been happy.

Just happy or cynically happy like me?

Depends on what you mean by “cynically”. I have had no reason to be mad, sad or anything like that, so I cannot say that I have been challenged - therefore I’m not really a cynic in my happiness.

@ ILB: I don’t think of you as “happy” so much as… I don’t know what the word for “achieved nirvana” is, but if there’s an adjective for it that’s what I think you are. I want to say “mellow” but that still doesn’t seem right.

You want “bodhisattva”, I think. Though that is really a title, not an adjective.

But, uh, thank you, I guess. ^_^

I think what I mean is I don’t get it. You’re like the anti-thesis of me. For the way I act no one can tell the difference between me and a Tourette’s patient with a cocaine habit. I don’t wanna be remembered like that. I had kind of a wake-up call about this kind of thing today. *frown* Not a good one either.

Ugh. I sound like a retard, I know, but it doesn’t derail the thread, does it? I’m still trying to talk about thought process.

By cynical, I mean that I am brutally honest with myself, recognize all the things that are terribly, horribly wrong with the world, and am unsurprised when my worst expectations come true. But somehow that doesn’t bother me. I’m not apathetic, I still care. But despite seeing all the tragedies that occur daily, I’m still happy and generally upbeat.

Otherwise it’s usually a show to see how many people I can fool into thinking I’m depressed (not many, I’m not the best of actors).

@Jerk: No, I’d say you’re on topic.

But how do you mean? You don’t seem any different from some of my friends, from what I’ve seen of you. And the way you describe yourself doesn’t fit with my impression.

@*Ninja: Ah. Well, I do have quite a bit of that.

I really appreciate the benefit of the doubt, but lately I’ve gone back to being self-conscious about stuff I say. I mean, I have fun being edgy but it’s too easy for me to cross a line and that kind of action came back to bite me on the ass today. It’s like I’m one or the other. Three years ago, I was so shy that I had an account on Gaia, right? I spent one whole year lurking before I said anything. I jumped on this forum the first chance I got and I haven’t regretted it, and I like the friends I’ve made here, but I’m startin’ to swing back the other way where I second guess myself. I hit the edit button three times on that last entry.

Maybe I’m just neurotic. I don’t know. I do know that I’m getting better about not derailing threads. The only reason that ever happens is that when someone says something I feel compelled to respond to it. D:

Bleh. I’ve been uncomfortably candid lately. I have got to stop doing that.

STOP SECOND GUESSING YOURSELF JERK!!!!!!!!!!

WE DON’T WANT YOU TO CHANGE, WE LOVE YOUR BITING WIT AND BRILLIANT (if often questionable) INSIGHTS JUST THE WAY THEY ARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DON”T GO CHANGING INTO A SELF-CONSCIOUS SHY GUY ON US!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WE LOVE YOU!!!!

Shouldn’t you have changed back to Sarcastic Ninja for that one? x)

Absolutely Not!

I was being serious and was concern you might actually regress into your less self-confident state!







Hah! I changed! See if you can tell if I’m being serious as Sarcastic or if I’m just yanking your chain!
PS Extra points if you can do it without confusing yourself!

You were Seriously Sarcastic.