Bittersweet Candy Bowl

One thing I love about this comic is how, not only does it contain some very well written and thought out drama, but it’s very good at making the characters grow and evolve as a direct result of said drama. So because of this (And because I’m powered by peoples problems :p ) I decided to make this thread, in which I ask those of you brave enough to share, to tell us of one or more moments of extreme drama in your life that has made you grow as a person.

What was the event? How did you deal with it? How did you change? etc…

Now, seeing as I’m asking people to lay such personal tales on the line, I’ll get the ball rolling with one that I seldom tell, but will share partially because the mood has hit me tonight, and partly because of the wonderous power that is internet annonimity.

When I was in my early teens, I was very close friends with a girl I met outside of school, back when I frequented the Library for internet use due to having none of my own. She had alot of issues with her parents, and she was in a somewhat rocky highschool relationship. But aside from the ocational pick me up ice cream cone, it didn’t affect our ‘hanging out time’.

Well… That is untill I went over to her house to visit unexpectantly. I knew she was home, so I snuck in the back, figuring I’d be a bit of an ass and try to make her jump, but that plan never really came to fruition. You see, when I found her, she was in her bedroom with a knife, and had slashed her arms and legs up really badly. And I mean REALLY badly.

I panicked seeing so much blood (as kid’s are wonton to do), but I managed to keep my composure enough to call 000 and get an Ambulence to come. I spent the next 10 minutes holding onto her as she dileriously mumbled to herself until the paramedics arived.

According to them, she had died in my arms before they got there. I was just in too much shock to notice.

I’m fairly sure that’s the point where I started to get really nosy about people’s personal issues, and developed my ‘broken wing’ complex. Because I’ve seen how all the little things can pile up while people just keep on smiling, untill finally they can’t take it anymore, and then they’re gone from your life for good. It’s also been that fear that has helped me notice people who’ve been on their last legs, and helping them before they give way under the weight of their problems.





WHEW!

So, here I sit, shaking a little from dredging up that memory. Not really sure what this on, but non the less, if anyone else is brave enough, share your own tales of real life drama. Be they as serious as mine, less so, or even worse.

oh my god… that is the most shocking thing i have ever heard, I’m so sorry :O

but to carry on, When I was in my early teens (surprise!) I was hanging with some of my friends when a girl came over and asked me to kiss her, I said no but she kept pestering me so I eventually said no and stormed off. I went to sit on one of the benches on the field when she found me and apologised, turns out she wasn’t talking to me… :S

Wow, Maverik… That must have been terrible. That poor girl…

@Maverik
Holy crap that’s terrible. I’m sorry that you had to go through such a tragic event.


The most drama I think I’ve had in my life is when my parents almost got divorced.

Like every other year, me, my family, and my friend’s family used to head down to Galveston and stay at their relative’s house. It was always good fun, we’d stay down for a few days, swim in the canal, go kayaking, go to the beach, all that good stuff. Well, the family friend’s neighbor was also always hanging out with us, cause he lived there permanently while the people we were staying with only came down on weekends.

So all the adults like to hang out at the neighbor’s house cause he has this big TV and nice stuff, and they usually just drink and hang out and stuff while me and my mates chill in the other house. Well one year, apparently the neighbor started flirting with my mom, and he’d supposedly done it subtly before. Needless to say, when my dad heard he got pissed, cause my mom was flirting back or something.
I never really cared much for going down to Galveston when I was younger (now that I’m older I’ve learned to appreciate these away times), so the next morning when my dad told me he was leaving a few days early I was like “HELL YEAH!” and joined him. No one told me about what happened till my mom came home with my brother a few days later on the original date, so I just assumed everything was normal. Then when my mom and dad got home, my bro was really upset to the brink of near crying, which was odd to me, cause my brother is usually a complete hard ass. So when I asked him what was up he told me the situation and everything seemed to make sense.

My mom later came into my room crying and told me she’d be staying at my grandad’s house for a while, so I was like “Okay Mom.” and gave her a hug, which made her cry more and continuously say how it was all her fault. I kept hugging her and eventually she left, and my brother came in my room to talk to me, cause he had to get out his feelings and his fears.

What’s interesting (and kind of scary) to me is the fact that when everyone else around me was losing control of their emotions, my brother weeping multiple times a day, my dad going into a depression which got bad enough that he asked my brother if he could buy him some weed, and my mom busting into tears any time she called, is the fact that I maintained my normal calm composure. I think that when I saw my brother in such a depressed state, I decided I’d have to be the strong one for the family and not let it destroy me like it was them. I always chatted with my dad for the next few weeks, the same with my brother, and whenever they asked me to do something for them, I did it without hesitation. My dad felt heartbroken, couldn’t get more than three hours of sleep, my brother already had a record of anger problems, and I knew that I couldn’t let them down by joining them, and that instead I had to be a positive image for them.

Eventually my mom and dad took a few months of marriage counseling and reconciled their relationship, but there’s still that air of awkwardness around the house. My mom apparently thinks I didn’t know she started smoking, my dad doesn’t know that I know he asked for drugs, and my brother comes to me with his problems before our parents.

I was always fairly calm before that event, but after it I just felt changed and it still makes me shiver how much of a drastic change it was.

But aside from that, there hasn’t been anything major in my life.

@Blaze
I’ve been in those situations before, but never like that ^^;

@Toasty
That’s still a pretty major event to go through. Very few people have the inner strength to pull themselves together and be the emotional rock of so many people. Massive respect.



Thanks for the kind words about my story BTW. It was a long time ago now, but it’s still nice to feel supported every once in a while. Even this long after the fact

When I was in seventh grade, my dad had a stroke at the age of 42. I was sick that morning, and was waiting in the kitchen to go to the doctor with my mom, when all of a sudden there was a loud thud. I didn’t see it, but my dad had fallen over in the bathroom. My mom ran in there, and he was only semi-lucid. Couple that on top of me wondering whats going on and three younger sisters that needed to get out for school, it was obviously chaotic.

Once the girls were out the door, my mom dropped me off at the doctors office and drove him to the hospital. They ran blood work, did some tests, and had no idea what had happened. A couple days later, when my dad still couldn’t even stand without help, they went back to their doctor, and he said essentially ‘Shit, he had a stroke. Emergency Room now!’

What had happened was, my dad has a hole in his heart that approximately 10% of people have. Usually, it does nothing. It’s a really tiny little pin prick. But in this case, a blood clot had managed to get its way through and traveled up to his brain and cut off blood flow to the cerebellum, which is the part of the brain that controls balance and fine motor skills.

Now, like I said before, I was in seventh grade and have three younger sisters. At the snap of a finger, my dad was hospitalized with a stroke, my mom was at the hospital with him every available minute, and was deathly afraid that he was going to die. The hospital had to do brain surgery to remove the dead portion of brain. Then there was another complication, where he was producing an excess of brain fluid, causing pressure build up in the skull. Another surgery was done to drain the fluid from his head to his stomach. Then there was the surgery to plug up the hole in his heart. Then he got an unknown infection that didn’t react to anything the hospital did. He was hospitalized for six months, and in that time I only saw him twice, and both times I had to wear a face mask, latex gloves, and full scrubs. Essentially, for those six months, I was in charge of everything. Of course, relatives came out to help, but thats all they were. Help. I had to make sure that everyone got to where they needed to be, made sure the horses got fed, the yard work was done, school work was done, and remember the directions for everything my sisters did. I know that it doesn’t sound like a lot, but I had never had to been responsible for everything like that before. I saw my mom sporadically, and prayed every night that my dad wouldn’t die.

After he got out of the hospital, my dad was on bed rest for several months. During those months, another blood clot developed and got to a lung. More surgery. Another round of relatives to help out. He got back home, and more bed rest.

A couple months after he went back to work, he was let go at DuPont when they did their big lay-offs a few years ago. Since then he has been let go and re-hired several times, the last lay-off being early December and the newest hiring earlier this month.

Fortunately, his physical therapy went fine when he went in it. He can walk perfectly, talk perfectly. If you didn’t know it, you would never guess that he had a stroke. The only things he can’t do are walk backwards and swing a golf club. Which is a shame, since he loves golf.

That was the biggest piece of drama in my life. I didn’t really go through the whole teenage scene because I had to skip it and grow up in seventh grade. Which isn’t so bad, except I had to wait for everyone else around me to grow up before I could relate well with them. I’m still waiting for the most part, actually. Maybe that’s why I don’t have very good social skills…

Eh, doesn’t matter.

That’s the biggest bit for me. Second biggest was a nasty break-up with my only girlfriend when she went to college a year before me, which is the reason I have very little faith in long distance relationships.

@Erebus
I can’t imagine what it would be like having so much responsibility heaped on me so young. But you’re stronger for it. I hope you don’t have to wait much longer for your friends to catch up to you

@Maverik
I hope so too. I never really had a group of people I hung out with though. I’ve been semi-voluntarily ostracized, as most of the people I did hang with are in college, and I’m waiting to hear back from the Air Force, as I’m enlisting. Hoping to make friends there though

And I can’t imagine having to go through what you did. I can only guess at how awful it must have been.

I guess I really don’t have significantly dramatic to tell.
Honestly, I feel like all these things are happening to people and I’m forced to listen to them all.
Other than a near break-up between my parents, I have nothing to relate with people.
All my maturity was through watching, but I’m pretty sure I won’t know how you guys felt till something happens to me.
(Not that I want something tragic, but something that makes me see the world more than dull)

It doesn’t have to be huge. Just something that changed a perspective of yours in life. A pet that meant something to you. A friend who changed your mind. A teacher who encouraged you to greater heights. A piece of drama that made a change.

I am blessed to have not had any real… BIG things go down right in front of me.

Although as of late, my grandmother (who has lived with us since before i was born) has been letting her mind go. She’s the daughter of a doctor, and in her time, the ladder of respect was like “God—Priests—Doctors” so she was raised as a sort of ‘pretty princess who always gets what she wants,’ and so now she pretty much acts like a 12-year-old about doing things. And you better damn well not criticize her for butting in on personal matters of whatever sort, she might not ever talk to you again.

Her son, my uncle, never knew how to handle money and thus always ends up depending on her for it. Recently, his car got repossesed, and my grandmother, in her stupid fashion, let him take her car, which he’ll probably stupidly trade in for ANOTHER truck he can’t pay for. Which leaves ME to cart her around at her beck and call, and she can’t realise that it’s HER fault for raising her son that way. Never mind that this is happening while my mother is incapacitated due to cancer complications, and while I’M looking for a job.

She’ll be moving out into an apartment attachment to her sister’s home in the coming months, but that’ll just move the inconvenience over to them. However, it’ll reduce the heavy weight on our shoulders by quite a bit, since she’ll finally be around family she respects more than us.

I’ll only miss her cooking.

Though another thing of mine comes to mind, actually. (sorry if it feels like i’m hogging, but my first one doesn’t really fit with the topic and i just needed to vent about that again.)

The first semester of our college years, my girlfriend was in something of a rut. Shortly before the semester started, she was forced to face with the loss of her grandmother as well as her family dog. That coupled with her first “on her own” experience weighed down on her and gave her recurring nightmares. After a while she talked to me about it on AIM one night. Good lord, how much i just wanted to reach through the computer screen right then.

Since that point i made sure to call more often. Not, like, stalker often, like once a week or so, just to make sure she was holding out. And now i tend to make a point of that for my other friends, too. To a lesser extent of course, but you get my drift. It just made me… well… more sensitive to what goes on around me.

i have this hilarious quote about this dreaming he was raped by disney characters and i would like rephrase it so it sounded like it was me or something i dunno but i can see were taking this thread seriously so fff

This is really geeky but…

I had a college roommate who was a Transformers nut and we got along fantastically; he’s my closest friend. After about a year he started to get depressed real bad. Failing classes, missing home/girlfriend, the usual things. He wound up moving out halfway though the year and I blamed myself for it. I hated that I couldn’t really help him, that all I could really do was watch him flounder until he gave up. That snowballed into the same problems he was having. My grades took a plunge and after a bombing a research paper, I was pretty committed to offing myself. I was going to do it at the end of the semester, after I had finished this big project for a class. I wound up with the best project in the class and that kinda pulled me out of my stupor. The project was about the messianic themes in popular media and my example was the transformer Optimus Prime.

He and I still keep in touch though and he’s a much happier person now.

Well, and I’m not trying to blame anyone here, it’s a bit difficult follow up “One of my friends died in my arms,” without feeling petty and shallow.

Unless, of course, you’re following up with “My dad spent the later half of my childhood in the hospital and I had to raise my three sisters by myself ‘cause my mom was too freaked out.”

I mean, Jesus. This certainly isn’t a thread for one-upsmanship, but nobody is going to top that one-two punch to the heartstings.

@DavCube
I can sympathize with the ‘reach through the computer’ feeling. I’ve… Experienced… A few long distance relationships. And there’s nothing worse than hearing them spill their soul out into a chat box and being able to do nothing more than type comforting words and the occasional “*Hug*”.

@TheNoun
I think everyone has a moment of rock bottom depression at some point during their schooling (or at least, everyone I know&hellip Glad to hear you escaped it intact

Also, mad props for working Optimus Prime into a research paper

@Quacksalver

It wasn’t because she was freaked out. She retained an almost unimaginable level of poise and self control throughout everything. I only saw her cry once during that time, and only because she thought she was alone. She was the real Rock of Gibraltar for me and my sisters, urging us to stay strong. It was just that everything going on, she was needed at the hospital in case something came up and a liability waiver or something needed to be signed. Plus, wanting to be near her husband of almost twenty years at the time when she had no clue if that day would be the last.

But no, I seriously agree with you. I would have posted something more mundane, except that would have made me feel, like you said, petty. How can someone open up like that without opening up yourself?

But again, like I said earlier, it doesn’t HAVE to be something like that. I don’t think…

@Erbus & Quackslaver
No. It doesn’t have to be anything quite so drastic. I myself questioned starting such a thread on that note, but I felt I partially felt like I’d be betraying the spirit of the thread if I didn’t put all my cards on the table as a show of faith, and partly because I couldn’t get the memory out of my head after reading the whole “Who do you identify with most” thread, so it was also in part a bit of catharsis for me.

I don’t think any issues people have gone through are petty. If it affected you, then it’s anything but. For some people, the worst they’ve endured is a stubbed toe. Others have had a pet die. The spectrum goes all the way down to the more extreme stuff, but if it somehow changed you, and hopefully made you stronger, than it’s anything but petty to talk about it.

All stories are welcome, no matter how insignificant you may think they are

The first several posts are just… wow. Also, I hope all of you guys are doing okay now.

Mine is not uber-dramatic, but it is a huge turning point.
In fourth grade, I realized halfway through the year that my group of friends, who I thought were my very best friends that cared about me, actually hated me and were secretly ostracizing me.

I must say that the girls in that particular group did have some issues, as they singled one of their group members out and bullied them like it was some monthly ritual, and I’ve gone through that prior, but I was either too dumb to notice or was in complete denial that in my case, the girls really did hate me whereas for the others it was just a bad fight.

I was a new student there, and already being halfway through the year, I was suddenly rendered friendless. If they just plain ignored me it would have been okay, but they would bad-mouth me in the schoolbus, to the point where they were telling Kindergarten kids to ignore me if I talked to them because I was a “crazy bitch”. It’s one thing to be bullied, but another to be attacked by who I thought were my friends.

Later, when they got bored of it, they moved on to the new monthly target and treated me like nothing happened, but the facade was already broken and I avoided them.

I do believe that was when something in me cracked and I basically stopped attempting to befriend people at all, unless they approached me first. What is probably the saddist thing is that it made me lost faith in people from my country as a whole, and to this day I have much more foreign friends than people from my country. I’ve gotten a little better now about trust issues, but my country people I still run away like the plague, and I will still angst about my inability to approach people from time to time. For something that happened years ago, it sure does last a long while.

It’s just amazing to hear what others have gone through in their lives at young ages. Nothing I’ve been through could amount to having a friend die or family hospitalized, but there’s still been things that have changed who I am today, who I could have been if things were different.

I’ve had something similar happen to me like what happened with Mike and Sandy, only for us we didn’t keep in touch, and I went into a depression that lasted for 5 years till I saw her again, to realized things were different and I had to move on like she had. It was tough having to come to terms with knowing the immense feelings of love I had for her weren’t reciprocated. I eventually pulled out of the depression with the help of friends and music, but I sometimes wonder who I would’ve been if either I hadn’t moved, or we’d kept in touch.

@Seiya
Guy’s definitely get the easier end of the stick when it comes to bullying. For all the bruises, cuts and ‘dead legs’ that I got, they would fade in a day or so. The phycological torment some of those girls put others through is just astounding though… It’s too bad you feel such negativity towards everyone local to you… Hopefully, one day you’ll meet someone who’ll make you challenge that perception. In a good way

@ScarfNinja
I’ve had a similar experience to that. Unfortunately, the what if’s never seem to go away. Try not to dwell on it too much though. Learn from your past, enjoy the now, and look forward to the future

@Maverik I usually don’t dwell on things from the past, there’s always those moments though that sneak up on you when you least expect it you know? Thankfully I have music to keep my spirits out of the dumps

Seeing as this thread is begging for this kind of thing, I thought I’d share something I pretend never ever happened and have a bit of a vent.

As a child, my Grandfather raped me.

Now, if this isn’t bad enough, he had also raped my mother and two of her sisters when they were kids. His job required him to move around a lot, and it turns out where ever he went, he managed to find the time to molest some poor bastard. I found this out after seeing a therapist, and having her tell me that my name was familiar, then realising who my grandfather was. Fucker was pretty much molested his way around the state for twenty years, and no one did a damn thing. My mother has me young, at about sixteen, and for a while everything is normal, up until I’m 10, then I start getting blank spots in my memory where I can’t remember things, places, people. At thirteen I get grounded for a year without music or friend visitation rights for using the computer to look up porn. At the end of that year she tells me what had happened to her. Next day I go to the school counselor and apparently I’m pretty upset about my grandfather, because up until now I loved him like nothing else, he always had a gift and a hug for me.

Guess there was a reason for that.

A little bit of therapy later and it turns out I’ve got repressed memories, and I figure out that grandad raped me too. Things fall apart from there, grades drop, I lose all confidence. I didn’t get angry though, I just hung out with what friends I had and ignored the problem. Some stupid stuff later and it’s off to another therapist. I tell her what happened and she speaks to my mother. I don’t go to her anymore, Mum didn’t like what she had to say.

I have trust issues now, find it hard to make friends. Dating and relationships are completely out of the question, find it hard to approach women like that,especially after being told I was creepy once. It scared me senseless to think that I could be turning into him and I wouldn’t leave my bedroom for three days. My folks were on a holiday so no one ever really knew that happened. I rarely talk to my parents, or my family for that matter.

That old bastard died last year, and I’m not ashamed to say I was ecstatic to see him go. He had a heart attack and crashed into a tree on the highway, and I hope he lay there in agony for a few hours before he finally expired. If any of you have some weird crap about forgiveness to share, go fuck yourself, it’s just intellectual masturbation for people who think that child molesters can be changed or saved.

They can’t.

I’ve thought of trying to go back to therapy, but I don’t have the money and the last time they just plain forgot about me, left me sitting in the clinic for nearly two hours before a secretary noticed me and tried to apologize, but I just walked out. I lay awake at night sometimes, afraid of my own headspace, of what’s in there behind all the curtains of blankness. I wonder just how great a grip on sanity I have, then realise that I really wouldn’t mind if I let go and just fell away from it all. Never thought about suicide though, so i guess that’s a plus.

Well, There it is. My defining moment of drama. Sorry if I scared some people out there, but I got drunk and saw the title, and I couldn’t help myself.

…

…Wow. I’m speechless. That’s… just awful. I’m sorry you had to go through all that.

these are the most depressing and thought provoking posts I have read. It’s really quite sobering to think that these things can acctually happen to people, and we never think they’re going to happen to us, but these kinds of things do… but wow, thoses seem like incredible berdens to carry, but I can only imagen the pain of brining up memmories like that and the releife of acctually getting stories like that off your chest. I guess what I’m trying to say is that you have my deepest sypathies and my prayers go with you (unless you don’t want them to)

…

Oh my goodness. Even being partially anonymous, I think it takes guts to bring up such an incident. I’m sorry you had to experience that, and I hope you will find your inner peace, someday.

Yeah, these things are hard to talk about. But when you do muster the courage to do so, you do feel a little lighter, as if you really did take a load off your shoulders. There’s a reason why the cliche description exists.

Oh dear I do hope everyone have at least found some resolution or closure.

@Seiya Sadly not everyone does find resolution or closure, or at least not for a long time. Some of it depends on who you have by your side through everything, any kind of support can greatly increase the healing process, no matter how little a person may think they’re helping, them paying attention to a person in need is more than they could even imagine. (I’m not sure where all I was going to continue with this, I lost track because of texting so I’m gonna hush now -3- )

Time is the greatest healer, and all things fade before it. I hope that those who had painful things happen to them can vent here, under the veil of the internet.

@Jeff in Aus
I’d offer a consoling hug, but I’m not sure you would welcome it… So let me just say that I don’t think you’re any less sane than anyone here. It’s a hard and long process, but you’ll pull through it. If you really want them, you can get those memories back. And if not, then they’re unlikely to bother you. Unless you encounter something similar that re-surfaces them :\

Unfortunately there’s not allot of advice I have for this particular tale… But if nothing else, at least know that you have friends here. Even if you don’t really see us that way.

This thread wins the “most depressing thread of the year” award. Or something like that, cuz this is seriously depressing. Makes my life seem like skipping through flowers

I mean… My mom died on me when I was 14 from cancer…
But I mean FUCK you guys are like literally holding DEAD PEOPLE in your hearts.

I guess I really have more of a question to ask all of you who had people precious (or maybe even relatively unknown) to you die:

When my mother passed, the last conversation I had with her was whispered and I had the impression that I did little to allay her worries about how the family would carry on; years later, I’ve always wondered what she was trying to get at or say to me that I’ll never know now— so what has been your greatest fear pertaining to these departed souls? That maybe they had a message that was never properly conveyed?

@Knul
My greatest fear is that I could have done something, anything, to prevent her death. I know I was just a kid, and there was probably nothing I possibly could have done. But it still nags at me from time to time. “What if you had realised earlier?” “What if you had gone over there an hour earlier?” etc… As I said before. It’s the what if’s that’ll get to you.

@ Knul
I can honestly say that I don’t regret a thing that I’ve said to anyone who has died. I think that maybe half of things you regret is how you approach them and the other half is just being lucky not to get sucked into a no-win situation. Sometimes you get wrecked by the outcome no matter what.

@ Maverik
Case in point to the last thing I said, never blame yourself for someone else’s choices. It’s not your job to convince her or anyone else to live. I spent years talking people out of suicide to figure out that some people can’t be saved, and some don’t want to be. I got tired of freaking out that I wouldn’t find the right words to say; I thought their life would be in my hands. But it never was. There’ll be times you can’t win, and all you can do is steel yourself against it and hope it happens as rarely as possible.

Blah blah blah rant rant rant. Sorry. I’ll keep this short so you don’t have to read much more if you got this far:

My “trauma drama” was the summer of 2008, spent a month in the hospital trying not to die from something (they didn’t explain it too well) that might have been e. coli. Succeeded, at the price of six inches of small intestine.

Wow, this threads mood needs to be lifted if even a tad bit for little while! Not being a jackass, but if it keeps going the way it’s been then I’d be scared to see what comes next. So I’ll say my most dramatic moments, which are nothing compared to what you guys said.

Back a few years ago I was coming home from a party with a mate when I decided to take a shortcut I had found shorty after moving to the area. (I’ll later find out that the long way was no better). Anyway we took the detour by the traveller’s (Irish Gypsies) area. Not having any problems before I didn’t believe a ll the racist stuff that exist of them back then. We were walking when these two Pikies (travellers) come up to and try to take our stuff. My mate run and I fucking froze. The wanker grabbed and after what seemed aeons of me standing there I gave him my phone. I was turning around to run when the bastard broke the bottle he had over my head. I stumbled, and the second hit made me realise the fucker wants me down and the adrenaline kicked in. Luckily, I found help, got home, went to the hospital and only had to get one stitch.

But what I did learn from that day, aside from not taking shortcuts at night was how to spot these bastards. And coming home from the cinema last Sunday I was sitting on the upper deck when this tosser comes and sits behind me. I can see from the mirror in the bus that he’s up to sowt. I mean he was drinking beer (illegal to drink in public here) and spitting ll over the floor. As I’m three stops from my house I decided to go down. True enough, as soon as I’m on the stairs he stands up. I get down quickly, pretend to press the stop button and sit down in the lower deck. He comes down, barging in and slams the stop button. He then realises I’m sitting and starts staring at me with hate. Yet he has to get off the bus. So he gets off and starts walking beside the bus still staring at me. As soon as we pick up speed he smashed the beer bottle on the side of the bus. I continued and got off home with no problems. I can laugh at what a tosser he was now, but it was kind of tense…

Wow, I don’t have much to add because I don’t give much measure to bad things that happen to me, and well, it’s kind of hard to have worse things to happen to you then the stuff I’ve heard on here. Honestly I’m pretty emotionally stunted because that’s how it was when I was a kid. You speak out emotionally and you get hammered down. So I grew up learning how to think to myself and keep myself company by thinking. It’s why I don’t mind being alone for hours on end. Thanks to my severe ADHD I’m not a wall flower though, so thankfully I have plenty of friends due to my outgoing nature. If not, I’m sure I’d be the one creepy quiet kid that nobody knows. I still feel like people don’t really know me sometimes though, not even my close friends.

The only thing I can really think of that has probably effected me the most psychologically throughout my entire life is the divorce of my parents. They fought constantly and loudly while I was a child, they still managed to raise me as a good kid, even when my mom moved out and was trying to get on her feet. They get along now, but they constant screaming and shouting and acidic comments behind each others backs will forever be ingrained into my soul. Because of this I grew up with a pretty bad temper and I was constantly confused about my emotions, at one point in my life I attempted to stab my brother with a steak knife, but stopped a couple inches from stabbing him. I never got counseling, because my parents never found out about it, because my brother then beat the shit out of me, and we agreed not to tell our parents so we could both stay out of trouble. But similar yet less severe events pervaded my life. I could keep calm to a certain point, and then I would snap and go into a blind rage. I’ve gotten better and better at controlling it over the years. But about a year and a half ago I nearly broke a girls nose/face because I threw a drumstick across the room in rage, nearly hitting her in the face. Since I was little I’ve always been the but end of the jokes, because I was younger and kind of goofy looking and acting. But, I’ve learned to take advantage of this, and become less annoying and more of a cool guy. I’ve gained a crap load of friends and have learned to control my anger.

My only regrets are that I’ve become more cynical and bitter then I should be at my age. This is probably from hanging around my father, who is probably the most pessimistic person on the planet.

@Pronkat: I love your regional dialect bro. Write a how-to book!

I think the defining moment of drama in my teenage life is gonna come in a few weeks. Can never tell.

I suppose I haven’t truly had any life-altering moments yet, but what always keeps me going is a combination of cowardice and a high on drama. Like, “I-didn’t-have-a-choice-that-I-was-bor n-but-now-that-I’m-here-lets-start-a-fight” drama.

Most of my life has been drama. Not because of family issues, but because of issues at school. Because of me being the gullible braniac of any of my classes, I was always tricked and teased since preschool. It wasn’t all that bad, but soon people became a little braver in my tourment. Sure, it was just a shove or a cuss here and there, but around fourth grade is when they began to take pleasure in mugging me, and EVERYONE knew about it. The other students thought it was hilarious, the teachers didn’t care, and my parents ment well, but just told me to, “Ignore them and they’ll go away”. Years later in my sophmore year at sixteen years old, my mom who I loved more then anybody in the world, died from pneumonia. Everyone in my family was heart broken, but I didn’t shed a tear; not because I didn’t love her, but because then and there I considered crying to be weak. I didn’t cry at the service, and I didn’t cry when I came back to school. Somehow the bullys found out about this, and thought of it as a new button to push. They confronted me on the bridge that goes over the river to my school when I was walking home, and began with their usual insults and remarks. I began to walk past them, but as soon as I began passing their “leader”, he said, “I had alot of fun with your mom last night. Oh wait, I forgot, that dumb bitch is dead!” I stopped dead in my tracks and looked right at his eyes. That was the last straw. “What’re you gonna do, hit me? Why don’t you go pussy out and cry to your mommy? Oh… Sorry~!” I clentched my fist and threw it at him. I put every ounce of my body, along with every year of suffering, every year of insults, everything they’ve done to me behind that one fist.

That one fist is the reason why he still can’t pronounce his words right, or remember anything for more then twenty minutes… and you know what? it feels good knowing that… VERY good… I never felt so good when my fist hit his face, and the way his eyes were still open even though he was knocked out, and the fear his gang shown to me when they ran off carrying him.

A short while later, I took up a sport that could give me the same feeling: Boxing. No, not kick boxing or some martial arts shit, real boxing. So far in my career at age seventeen, I forced three boxers to retire early because of to many injuries, and have never lost a match to anyone of those pussys they throw into the ring with me. I’m going to prove to everyone who thought me to be weak that I ain’t taking any of there shit anymore.

So to anyone who thinks that they can have there way with me, to anyone who thinks that I’m the weak little pussy that I was years ago: Come and get me. I fuckin’ DARE ya to try to have your way with me! Because as soon as you strap on the gloves and step into the ring, I swear to my dead mother that I will make sure that you will never be breathing when I’m done with you!

Oh geeze, think he deserved that punch.
(though I wonder if that got you detention)
Still, you have something that motivates you to stand up for yourself.
(not saying to hold a grudge or forgive your tormentors, but let the wound heal if it hasn’t already)

Why hold a grudge when you can get revenge? I make sure to pay everyone back who so much as looks at me… I remember when I went up against this one cocky son of a bitch who was debuting his first match. He kept talking about ho he was going to be the best. Even when he was out cold, I was still hitting him, making sure that he never fell… because if he did, I wouldn’t be able to keep hitting him. The ref stopped me though… I wasn’t able to kill that rookie, but I think it’s safe to say his dreams of being the best just crashed and burned…

Hm, glad you have a way to let out your steam.
(I’m sure you heard the whole talk about revenge already)
If we ever meet, remind me not to piss you off.

@Jake
While it’s definitely good to stand up for yourself, and that guy way back when certainly deserved to be decked something fierce… I’m afraid I just don’t agree with your philosophy. As cliché as it is to say, you sound kind of like you’re becoming what you used to hate. Sure, you don’t go picking the fights… But take for example the rookie you mentioned in your last post. Why destroy him like that? Because he was cocky? Nothing wrong with aiming to be the best. If he’s really being a bit of an ass, beat him. Don’t let him score. But why ‘crush his dreams’?

I know that life isn’t all sunshine, rainbows and lollipops. Hell, just look at my first post. But that doesn’t mean you need to outright destroy everyone who, as you put it, ‘so much as looks at you’. People who refuse to fight are not necessarily weaklings. And people who fight through all their problems are not necessarily strong.

But hey. That’s just my views. I dealt with most of my anger issues years and years ago, and became a pacifist. I hate fighting when it’s fueled by anger and hate or vengeance etc.

I didn’t destroy him because he was cocky, I destroyed him because he was weak. All he did in the weight check room was talk about how he was going the be the greatest boxer in the world. That’s MY title! I went through more hell then he did! I am the strongest fighter in the ring! If anyone else even thinks that they can take the title of “World Champ” away from me, I’ll make sure that ass ramming sons of bitches will never leave the ring alive!

@Jake-Yeah sounds like he deserved that and more

My life has been nothing but minor drama, especially after reading through all of this. A defining moment for me…I’d say my Junior year of high school. There was this one little Freshmen a pest who thought it was funny that a Junior such as myself was in French I. He also thought it would absolutly hilarious to surround me with four of his friends and subject the Junior to a variety of verbal abuses. I ignored him so soon that little Freshman realized that I wasn’t going defend myself and used the opportunity to began to question my sexual orientation, among other things. I finally told him to stay the hell away, effectively stopped going the that class altogether and avoided him as much as possible. This worked until the school noticed the many absences, refused to let me alter my schedule, and basically forced me back into the class. I still have no idea what this Freshman’s problem is, but ignoring him wasn’t working, the teacher was (and is)…incompetant, and I don’t like fighting, I’ve always avoided it, I wasn’t going to let him provoke me. That lasted for about three more weeks until by chance I happened to meet him alone on the way back from the bathroom, sitting on a bench and texting on an expensive looking cell phone of his. He looked up, said something along the lines of “how ya doing *(nameless)*”, something neutral, to which I responded by turning around pulling out a soda can that I’d just gotten from a vending machine, and chucking it at his head. I missed him, instead I hit his expensive looking phone, both the soda and the phone…exploded would be the best way to put it. Despite being in the middle a normally busy hallway there were no other witnesses, he was never able to prove anything despite being covered with sticky bits of plastic, and that quickly solved my Freshmen problem.

So there, just a minor moment of drama really, I’ve had worse, I’ve seen much worse, but that is the only time anybody has ever provoked me into a fight before or since.

@(nameless)
You should have given him a haymaker to the face… Hell, tell me where he lives, I’ll go over there and beat the shit out of him for ya!

@Jake-Hey, I’m still about nonviolence—>(and more importantly I never found out where he lived, he disappered a couple months later never saw him again).

Eh, I still think you should’ve given him one to the face…

@(nameless)
I always used to laugh when younger kids tried to start shit with me. I’ve dealt with bullying since grade 1, so it didn’t affect me anymore, but it was just always hilarious to have a kid half my size trying to act tough to me. I’d literally just double over laughing at the ludicrousness of the situation. Seemed to deal with the issue well enough lol.

@Jake
Tell me something though… It was his first fight right? So the chances of him actually beating ANYONE who had at least a few bouts under their belt were slim. So… What did you accomplish by doing what you did? Did you prove you were better than him. Yes. But that’s not really a badge of honour. Did you stop him from boxing? Possibly. But I don’t really see the benefit of that either…

You destroyed him because he wanted your title. Your future claim to fame. He was after the same goal as you. But I ask you this… You want the title… But do you want to earn it. Or do you not care how you aquire it. If everybody else just quit boxing and you were automatically awarded that title, would you feel vindicated?

If so, then I’m sorry for wasting your time. You might as well print out a sheet of paper with the title on it, because it’ll mean just about as much…

But if not… Then wouldn’t it have made more sense to win the bout, and encourage him to come back and fight you when he’s better at it? Every opponent you face has the potential to become a challenge for you. A chance to PROVE you are the strongest, the best. Even if they aren’t right now. Why would you deny yourself that? For a petty victory now? Or a glorius triumph later. And even if he didn’t come back and be a challnge for you. So what? If that’s the case he was never going to take your title anyway.

Well….Jake…if what you’ve said is true, then I’d suggest talking to a therapist. That’s not exactly healthy behavior, and you’re probably going to land your ass in prison one day.


If that was for the luls, then congrats on a successful troll.

I wasn’t planning on accomplishing anything with that fight, I was using him as an example to all the other fighters out there. I used him to say, “If you don’t come prepaired, you’re gonna end up like him”. Why did I destroy him? It was because he was stupid enough to actually ask for a fight against me, it was to teach him a lesson.

And I did stop him from boxing, I battered his brain around to the point where any simple motor function is at the very least difficult for him. Why is he in a wheelchair? Because he can’t even keep his balance on his own two feet. I will never see him in the ring again…