Bittersweet Candy Bowl

See, that’s how your story from the drama thread should have ended. I wouldn’t have had a problem with that punk-ass in a wheelchair, but cocky shit-talking’s just part of boxing. I’d think a knockout would be enough of a payback.

But that’s the thing, nobody talks shit to me… Ever.

Well, yeah, at the end of the day it’s you that makes the choice in the ring how hard to beat somebody. How do you deal with that kind of thing outside the ring? I only bring it up because there’s sometimes you just don’t have a choice but to let it go. =/

But, shit: Next time on “Full House” - somebody learns a lesson… about sharing.

How do I deal with it out of the ring? Easy, I punch the problem in the face ‘till the problem’s solved…

I’m talking about the stuff that you can’t solve by punching it in the face. Sound lame, right? But bear with me a second. Ex-girlfriends? Family members?

I had one girl friend, but that was when I was a wimp. She left me because I wasn’t that “Strong guy” she was looking for. Well fuck her, she can burn in hell for all I care! If she wassn’t a girl I’d beat the shit out of her…

I hear that. Shit, I can see what you mean if he’s a dick and doesn’t know his own limits, keeps getting back up thus forcing you to beat him. It’s boxing, right? If he’s standing, you have to hit him. But why bring his parents into it?

Because I could… He deserves the worst I have to offer.

Alright. So tell me about your boxing career, if you feel up to it. Weight division and all that stuff. You know, I don’t know about all the details about boxing but what’s to know when you’re watching two guys beat the shit out of each other, am I right?

I am a 17 year old male featherweight professional outboxer. My reach from fingertip to fingertip is 210 cm., which would be considered ungodly for the featherweight class, which has an average arm length of 155cm. I I have an average body weight of 145 lbs., 20 lbs. more then the featherweight weight limit of 126 lbs. So I have to go on weight check to lose 20 lbs. in order to enter any of my matches. My height is exactly 6 ft. My main style and weapon of choice is the “Hitman” style and the “Flicker Jab”. If you don’t know what that is, here’s a video that shows what it looks like: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvEaUiUy6Js
Keep your eye on the dude in the purple shirt, the one with the mullet.

Oh yeah, I’ve seen enough featherweight fights to know how those go. Fuckin’ fast stuff, right there. The whole name “featherweight” kind of annoys me though. I’ve seen those bastards knock out contenders twice their size. I’ve never understood the whole weight check thing either. How would you lose 20 lbs. to join one of those things? Ever just think “fuck it” and enter a higher weight bracket?

The weight check is to make sure that both boxers have the weight in a match, because our power dosen’t come from our arms, but from our entire body. The more weight one has, the stronger the persons punch. But there is a flaw that most boxers found in the weight system. After the weight check, the fighters are allowed a few days to get into their best condition for the match. If I’m going up against someone who is naturally 125 lbs., and if I use the days between the check and the match to regain those pounds that I shed (carbo loading with easy to digest foods), I’ll be walking into the ring with my natural body weight, bringing 20 more lbs. of power with me. Of course, losing 20 lbs. in around a month is tough. Sometimes I have to resort to not eating or drinking water to lose the weight. It’s unhealthy, but it’s quick and efficient, and I only use that strategy if nothing else is working. You need a will of steel to get through it, and to handle the dissapointment of going on the scale and finding out you were one pound shy of being able to enter the match. That’s why I got so pissed at that one kid, it’s easy to brag when you don’t have to worry about losing any pounds. Well, my flicker shown him who’s the strongest…

Dear Taeshi,

I was in love with Paula in Earthbound in 1997. That was my first exposure to a romance story, however vague. I wrote romance stories based on her relationship with a character that never ever spoke through which to live vicariously for years afterward.

Humiliated,

- Johnny Vincero

And now you draw a neat webcomic. For shame, lacking confidence like that. x3

Dear Taeshi,

When I was very little, I wanted to get a Sonic game, but despite having a Genesis, never asked for it, but only watched the Hedgehog from afar, because he was a great figure that should only be seen and not played.

I was a weird chiiiild.

-Seiya

And I only have a very small and insignificant moment of victory I can remember because I was and still am a meek child who doesn’t speak up.

We had an English test in elementary school. Bear in mind this is neither America nor UK nor any other English-speaking country. English is this hard thing that is a bane to many a child.

Anyhow, for the test you had to memorize 100 vocabularies.

All those kids who made my life living hell, they were panicking and going nuts and aaaaaaaaaaaaugh how do we memorize all thiiiiiiiiiiis. And it’s a huge test waaaagh.

Due to circumstances, I was pefectly fluent in English even then. I looked at the vocabularies (which consisted of: mother, father, refrigerator, ball, cat, dog, post office, etc), looked at the panicking kids, and LAUGHED.

I mean laughed real hard so they can hear me.
And then I went to read a book.

I mean duh of course I had a HUGE advantage and didn’t need to study at all for that test, but damn if that didn’t feel good.

When I was in school I had a class that taught basic film making stuff. I got lucky and was grouped with some friends for the final project. We had to do a video about “overcoming adversity” and we decided to make the dumbest thing possible. We wound up winning some student film making contest with it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=56QAOP5G2Xw

(I’m the robot)

I find that a lot people who learn English as a second language speak and write better English than most of the honkeys by whom I am surrounded. ;p

Still: props. Sega Genesis? Are you a child of the 80’s like me?

A child of the 90’s actually.

For reasons unknown to me we had a Sega Genesis. I guess I probably asked my parents to buy me one? Otherwise there would be no reason for it to be there… unless my parents just thought a video game would be nice for me and bought whatever what the hot new(?) thing.

I dont have much victory in life(because i live in a calm town) but in games i beated the Super Robot Taisen OG Gaiden wich the 3 last bosses are very dificult to defeat(A shura centaur robot,a eye like alien and Neo Granzon),and last beat the Super Robot Taisen Z in Super Robot Route the last boss did two clones of him and i haved to beat the clones and the original to complete the stage,man i had to do many strong attacks.
And beated the mysterious knight in KH2 Finalmix(that guy was strong)

Well, once I beat a guy playing poker and then proceeded to light a card on fire.

S’that count?

That’s actually pretty neat. I had an NES the Christmas when it first came out, but my dad dropped it, broke it and didn’t replace it. BAWWWWWWWWW.

Well, so much for reminiscing about the Berlin Wall with you. ;p

Hmm victories…victories…

OH I KNOW
I shall relate the story of the little firebird that could!

We had rehearsals for a Theatre show, (yes, I was a high school drama kid, but the weird kind who was immune to drama), anyways,as we got started someone burst into the theater soaking wet and told us to get the hell out now or we’d be stranded for a few hours because it was flash flooding. So, those of us with cars ran out to them and proceeded to get the hell out. Me and two friends hopped into my car. Which was a Pontiac Firebird. We start to drive and a few minutes later realize its a terrible idea as there was no visibility or traction. But it was too late to turn back…we narrowly avoided 3 crashes and i managed to drop them off near their house. One friend gave me a salute an I turned to brave the rest of the trip home, alone. I managed to cross into my neighborhood but to my dismay, the water was deeper than I thought. My that, i meant it went up to my headlights. There were multiple stalled cars on that street and I feared my little firebird would be next if I dared stop for a second. So my firebird and I plodded on through and slowly but surely, made it home.

The car that was submerged in water defied nature and delivered me to salvation. The end. Hope you enjoyed my wall of text, I really just wanted to write that.

@ Ace: I encourage this sort of thing. +1 Jerk points.

Took an AP test high on smackers (ecstasy) and aced it.
I’m a fucking genius.

I’m no expert, but I don’t think ecstasy really affects the parts of the brain that would make taking a written test difficult.

Yeah, it tends to just affect the part that lets you live.

High Five!

Yesterday, (May 8th) I fought my 16-year-old cousin, who is somewhere around 6’ 5”, and won. I am currently 13. HELL YEAH!!!!

found a copy of starfox on snes at a yardsale and got it for 50 cents
gave it to my friend for his birthday earlier yesterday
he loves me
i love him
were bros
starfox brings people closer

Starfox is the shit. Undeniable.
And don’t rain on my parade. I was really on. X fucks with your attention span.
I’d like to see you take the APUS test while tripping major balls.

I don’t even know what that is.

Wednesday, me and my girlfriend were walking down the corridor at school and joking around, and i smacked my thumb off my leg so hard that i thought i sprained it. It’s not Monday and it still hurts to move it and i have a thing dark purple bruise. Thinking maybe i broke it.

Ah Starfox. I played Starfox 64. I managed to beat every possible alternate route and the alternate version of Andross (when you follow the ghost of James McCloud to escape) when I was only 8 years old. Looking back on it, I’m like, “Damn, my little bro is hella awesome and all, but I don’t think he would be able to do that.
And I do mean hella awesome. Rubik’s cube in under 2 minutes awesome (and topping the middle school Rubik’s time board when he was still in 4th grade). And an actual magician who can walk into a magic shop and say, “None of the kiddie beginner stuff, please” show the guy a trick he invented, and say “…so, what have you got that’s interesting?” He’s 13. He’s been at it a couple years now. He’s also the drummer in my other brother’s band. And he’s a lady killer. Our whole family tagged along on a trip to Italy for the school choir and select members of the band, and he was one of the drummers. The whole trip, he had a gaggle of highschool girls following him, while he did all sorts of card and coin tricks, and was the first one to get up to dance when we were all eating at a restaurant and the accordion player started to play an up-tempo number.

Because of THIS, I will never be able to play Starfox again.


Ever.

My very first videogame EVER in my life was Diddy Kong Racing for the N64.
I spent months, MONTHS playing through the campaign and became enamored with the characters and scenery. Then along came fuckin’ Wizpig. I couldn’t come CLOSE to betting that thing.

Fast forward 9 years. NINE whole years later, I dust off the N64, and begin my final battle.
I am pleased that age has not reduced the challenge any; Still, infuriating defeat dogs my every attempt. AT LONG LAST, AFTER MUCH PRACTICE, MUCH EXPERIMENTATION, I HAVE FOUND THE KEY TO SUCCESS.
Victory, my friends, is a dish best served with bacon.

And that was the best day of my life, returning to my childhood, and feeling as though a huge chapter of my life finally could come to a close, where for years and years the story suddenly stopped.

>.>
<.<

I got laid last night. B)

DAMMIT NO

Dx

I hate to revive such an old thread, but I just had to post this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oWvYN9L739E
I’m the guy in the red swimsuit/ no shirt. It shows it three times, (once full speed, once 50%, once 25%) Props to Nick though (the guy who got owned) as he went down he still manged to pass the ball to his teammate who got it into the bucket (the goal of the game)

Note: if you don’t play warhammer 40k then you won’t understand, don’t even try… and yes it is a little nerdy

i was playing an apocalypse match at a friends house because he wanted to use his space marine army of almost 100 models. i didn’t have a single army large enough to allow that so i mustered a squad of Eldar , 20 imperial guard, two squads of Tau. my Ork army and my space marine army. AND MY ARMY WAS STILL SMALLER! also i didn’t have any vehicles unless you count my dreadnought but he had one too.

any way my 5 terminators blew up his rhino and then engaged his squad of FIFTEEN TERMINATORS not including his TERMINATOR CHAPLIN. my tau and marines tied up his tactical squads for a while but were eventually forced to retreat.

our dreadnoughts spent the whole game fighting each other(with mine eventually winning). my terminators started kicking his ass so in his desperation he swamped my terminators with two squads. so i returned the favor by launching my Orks into the melee to compensate. this continued for a while until basically the centre of the table was amassive ball of all our modles.

and i won =D

well I was surfing one day (for the first time) and something knocked me off of my board thin before I knew it a huge shark went up and bit my leg and drug me under. Luckily some one saw it and called the cops. Meanwhile I was looking at this shark an the first thing that popes into my head was to punch it like in the movies, and that shit works. It let go and swam off, so I grabbed my board tried to paddle back but ended up blacking out and waking up in a hospital, 115 stitches and some R n’ R later I was back to normal.

FALCON PUNCH !!!!!

the end.

Oh and another time me and [beep] were walking through a parking-lot when we saw some people beating on this kid, like a kid-kid so me and [beep] ran over and told the to thugs to stop. As soon as [beep] told them to stop they stopped beating the kid and came toward us. Well my friend thought it would be a good (or should I say dumb) idea to pretend he had a gun, long story short [beep] and me almost got killed and the kid ended up saving us. Thanks kid.

@ J. zezy
you got the shit beat out of you, right

yes, yes I did

J. zezy-
the shark thing…
i think i read about you in the paper… when was this ?


anyway,my story of success/fail:
in high school,due to pure coincidence,the 2 classes of “dumb” kids
(i.e ones who got very poor grads in middle school.) were on the top floor,directly above the normal kids
classrooms and especially one class where i think were gifted kids.
so the sons of bitches started laughing at us and singing songs about us…
bad move…
we started spending recess by throwing crap at them from the top floor whenever they went out.
we had to stop that game when i went too far and threw a trash can at a guy… and got expelled.
(the guy was fine,plastic trashcan.)

oddguy-

2005
I don’t think I was, no one told me and I didn’t see any thing about it. Still if it wasn’t me i feel bad for that other guy. That stuff sucks

any-way ya i got shot in the head with a bottle rocket yesterday

The other day I went on an MVPing spree (killing bosses one after another) with 2 friends and my bro (on essenceRO).

We ran into Cthulhu, and managed to kill it even though we were only 4, as that one requires about 7-8 people in the party. That means we rock as a party. Sadly, it didn’t drop anything.