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Getting Married

Poll: Marriage (87 member(s) have cast votes)

Would you like to get married eventually?

  1. Yes (58 votes [66.67%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 66.67%

  2. No (7 votes [8.05%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 8.05%

  3. "The Man" is keeping me down, man! (aka, the local law doesn't allow it) (1 votes [1.15%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 1.15%

  4. Spreading the love around (aka polygamy) (2 votes [2.30%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 2.30%

  5. Not sure quite yet (19 votes [21.84%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 21.84%

Vote Guests cannot vote
While on the subject of having children in that other thread, I think it'd be interesting to hear everyone's opinions on getting married.

Personally, I'm on the edge about it. For legal reasons, like inheritance, next of kin, that kind of stuff, I mean, yeah, I could justify getting married. But...I kinda don't want to. I don't know if I'll find someone I can get along with well enough to make that commitment.

It's something reading BCB brought out in me, I think. I don't have a childhood friend at all. I barely had any friends until maybe halfway through high school, and even now, I don't have more than a couple good friends; I make friends as fast as I lose them. I just can't see myself making a genuine, innocent bond of companionship with someone at this point in my life. I mean, hell, I almost fucked up and had a kid when I was 15. I guess my standards are just too high now. :unsure:

Anyway, time for someone else to share now.

This post has been edited by ReyOzymandias: 07 July 2011 - 05:03 PM

  • #1
  • 07 July 2011 - 04:34 PM
Oh, I really want to get married one day, no questions asked.
  • #2
  • 07 July 2011 - 04:49 PM
Like the kid decision, it's not something I look towards in the future. My present self would not want to get married or have kids but there is no telling what changes I (or you) will take in the future. People change.
  • #3
  • 07 July 2011 - 04:49 PM
Good point *adds "unsure" to the poll*
  • #4
  • 07 July 2011 - 05:03 PM
I have nothing against marriage. I'd love to get married at some point in my life but extrapolating on my current situation in general it's not going to happen.

This post has been edited by esalaka: 07 July 2011 - 05:08 PM

  • #5
  • 07 July 2011 - 05:06 PM
  • SushiJaguar
  • Internet Tough Guy<br>P.S. I roleplay as a medieval furry
    Member
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

No.
  • #6
  • 07 July 2011 - 05:40 PM
  • Grass
  • Is fucking Panny up in heaven
    Member
I think there is a guy or gal out there for everyone. So yeah, I plan to get married one day.
  • #7
  • 07 July 2011 - 10:34 PM
It's a long way to New York, Grass.
  • #8
  • 07 July 2011 - 10:38 PM
  • Grass
  • Is fucking Panny up in heaven
    Member
I'll go anywhere for you jerk. <3
  • #9
  • 07 July 2011 - 11:14 PM
Theoretically, I can get married any time I want.

However, I prefer to actually experience dating first. Before dating? Actually being attracted to someone. Until then, I have no idea if I'll ever get married.
  • #10
  • 07 July 2011 - 11:37 PM
I know, babe.
  • #11
  • 08 July 2011 - 12:21 AM
  • Taeshi
  • one hot bitch
    Administrator
lol I'm already married by law
  • #12
  • 08 July 2011 - 02:24 AM
I believe there is someone in this hellish world for everyone. But finding them is the life goal. So yea. But later in my life.
  • #13
  • 08 July 2011 - 04:19 AM
You work hard to make yourself presentable until you find a compatible personality. Maintaining it takes even harder work and both parties have to participate. Add all this to the fact that everyone is in a constant state of change and you'll see that someone who is right for you now may not be right for you later. You can exercise to attain and maintain sex appeal, you can read to make sure you always have something to say and a way to say it and so on. I'm not saying every single thing you do is motivated by raising your potential for starting a relationship (on the contrary, whatever you do to improve yourself should be for yourself and not some hypothetical girl/boy), but if you don't work to improve them your chances will be shit and sitting around hoping you'll get lucky will turn you into shit. That's all.

TL;DR: Soul-mates are bullshit.
  • #14
  • 08 July 2011 - 05:01 AM
Given the right attitude and person, marriage is great. It's not for everyone I think, and you shouldn't feel like you have to get married. I honestly did not think I wanted to marry anyone ever and then I ended up meeting my current husband and things just clicked and it just kind of happened :). There will always be some kind of sacrifices that each person will need to make and sure sometimes there will be times where we need to make things work..but it is not work for us to keep the relationship maintained usually because we work so well together and it happens naturally.
  • #15
  • 08 July 2011 - 08:52 AM
It sounds like thats right up my alley since I really would like to have a real relationship at some point in my life, but I dont have many redeeming qualities, so theres probably not enough benefits to marrying me
  • #16
  • 08 July 2011 - 09:21 AM
Hmm... none of the options fit my stance.

I believe marriage is redundant. People will be together as long as they want to be together. People will stop being together when they dont want to be together anymore.

With marriage, all that happens is that you must add divorce to the equation assuming they get separated, or in some cases, forces them to feel like they should stay together even when they dont want to anymore.

What I mean to say is, a couple that is meant to be doesnt need to be married to be happy. Since I have nothing against getting married, I might as well do it if I intended to stay with that person anyways.
  • #17
  • 08 July 2011 - 10:45 AM
The best reason to get married:

Ashley Madison® - Married Dating & Discreet encounters - Have An Affair
  • #18
  • 08 July 2011 - 04:53 PM

View PostKaizy, on 08 July 2011 - 09:21 AM, said:

It sounds like thats right up my alley since I really would like to have a real relationship at some point in my life, but I dont have many redeeming qualities, so theres probably not enough benefits to marrying me


I don't have many redeeming qualities either, but somehow I find people who are interested in me. And to be honest, from what I've seen from you around the forums, you seem like a nice enough person to me. It's just a matter of finding the right person who makes you happy.

Why should marriage have to be beneficial? It's not like I expect anything from people I want to be in a relationship with. If I feel a strong enough connection to them, that's enough for me.
  • #19
  • 08 July 2011 - 05:42 PM
I wanna get married someday, maybe a couple years from now #^_^#
  • #20
  • 08 July 2011 - 05:54 PM
Already married to Daisy, so, yeah.
  • #21
  • 08 July 2011 - 09:38 PM

View PostReyOzymandias, on 08 July 2011 - 05:42 PM, said:

I don't have many redeeming qualities either, but somehow I find people who are interested in me. And to be honest, from what I've seen from you around the forums, you seem like a nice enough person to me. It's just a matter of finding the right person who makes you happy.

Why should marriage have to be beneficial? It's not like I expect anything from people I want to be in a relationship with. If I feel a strong enough connection to them, that's enough for me.

By "benefits" I was referring to those personality traits of mine

Also I seem fine enough around here
You have to know me a little better to spot the flaws :smirk:
  • #22
  • 08 July 2011 - 09:59 PM
I'm sure you're a much better person than you give yourself credit for ;)
  • #23
  • 08 July 2011 - 10:10 PM
Mmm I most defiantly want to one day. I mean not for a while, I would like to get school out of the way first, but afterwards yeah.
  • #24
  • 08 July 2011 - 10:11 PM
  • wacko
  • Knows more about BCB than Taeshi
    Member
"Defiantly". XD
  • #25
  • 08 July 2011 - 10:17 PM

View PostReyOzymandias, on 08 July 2011 - 10:10 PM, said:

I'm sure you're a much better person than you give yourself credit for ;)

Im not denying that I can be a very friendly and nice person
I just have lots of personality problems that make marrying me more like a burden than a privilege

Also, Ive been exploring the possibility of being asexual and just kicking romance to the curb
From what Ive seen from friends and such, all it leads to is more problems than you started with :/
  • #26
  • 08 July 2011 - 10:35 PM
Yea I'd like to get married eventually..."eventually" is the key word though...
  • #27
  • 08 July 2011 - 10:43 PM
What if you found someone willing to carry that burden? I've been through a few of relationships, and a lot of the time problems arose from the fact that I was willing to work with my partners flaws but my partner refused to work with mine. Don't give up on it entirely, it takes a little bit of trial and error. You probably aren't going to find the right person the first time, but when you do, I bet it will be worth it.

Although, who am I to speak, I haven't found the right one yet either, but I hear good things about it.
  • #28
  • 08 July 2011 - 10:50 PM
Theres always the possibility that someone along the road will be willing to give me a shot, but I get more excuses than I do offers, so whatev
I suppose the single life aint bad so far :smirk:
  • #29
  • 08 July 2011 - 11:03 PM
I feel like I want to go through life alone. I dunno, I just like being alone...I experience things more positively when I'm alone and usually have more fun when I'm doing something alone. Having a partner requires you to give half yourself or more to that person on a daily basis. I barely give my friends time to hang with me.
  • #30
  • 09 July 2011 - 08:20 AM
Thats a good point
I seem more content when Im alone a lot of the time
If Im around most people for too long I tend to get annoyed with them for unclear reasons
Guess Im just not much of a people person
  • #31
  • 09 July 2011 - 08:32 AM
  • ILB
  • secretly a man :smirk:
    Member
Ooh, yes, I would most certainly love to get married. #^_^#
  • #32
  • 09 July 2011 - 02:32 PM

View PostGrass, on 07 July 2011 - 10:34 PM, said:

I think there is a guy or gal out there for everyone. So yeah, I plan to get married one day.


If you mind would you find one for me, too :V
  • #33
  • 09 July 2011 - 08:03 PM
I wouldn't mind getting married but right now the idea of common law works for me.
  • #34
  • 10 July 2011 - 12:14 AM
  • Borg Lord
  • Talk shit about furries and see how mad I get!
    Member
If at some point it seems like the appropriate thing to do, I presume I'll do it; if not I suppose I'll live alone. Which would probably be for the best since I've already got plans to die alone with someone and it would be quite troublesome to cancel them.
  • #35
  • 10 July 2011 - 09:58 AM
I would get married no hands down but I wouldnt act like the married couples in my family and argue almost all the time i would agree withe the person I married at least 99.8% of the time cause there would be at least some things we disagree on I'm not shooting for perfect husband
  • #36
  • 11 July 2011 - 02:02 AM
The word you're looking for is "doormat," and you actually have to take a pair of safety scissors and cut off your testicles while you sign the pre-nup.
  • #37
  • 11 July 2011 - 02:04 AM
All I said was I wouldn't want to argue all the time I hate that so if I had to give up something it would at least Be my say in things to keep the peace so we wouldn't argue so much I'm not even sure though im still making my mind if you lived like I did and see my mon and step-dad argue every hour of every day you might do the same

This post has been edited by Tensa Zangetsu: 11 July 2011 - 02:12 AM

  • #38
  • 11 July 2011 - 02:09 AM
You said you'd agree 99.8% of the time. Do you think conflict avoidance actually improves relationships? It doesn't. Fighting isn't necessarily a bad thing as long as you know how to pick your battles.

Agreement for the sheer sake of avoiding a conflict will turn you into a doormat. Yeah, you'd have to give up some things, but you can't go full combative or full passive. One is flippant and bitchy and the other is cowardice.
  • #39
  • 11 July 2011 - 02:14 AM
Okay now I have to think about that well thanks for the info

This post has been edited by Tensa Zangetsu: 11 July 2011 - 02:17 AM

  • #40
  • 11 July 2011 - 02:15 AM
I'm alright with the idea of marriage (which is probably a good thing because I am engaged). I guess it's kind of a way to say "you are mine". Unless people are forced into it, then it's less "you are mine" than "I possess you!"
  • #41
  • 11 July 2011 - 04:18 AM
I'm worried about being a pathetic husband now （；￣ェ￣）
  • #42
  • 11 July 2011 - 05:27 AM
If you need advice from Jerk, you probably will be.
  • #43
  • 11 July 2011 - 05:55 AM
I wouldnt consider it advice just a tip
  • #44
  • 11 July 2011 - 05:56 AM

View PostOneLonelyPickle, on 11 July 2011 - 05:55 AM, said:

If you need advice from Jerk, you probably will be.

When I'm wrong, feel free to call bullshit on me.
  • #45
  • 11 July 2011 - 08:15 PM
If i ever get married, then the least i would do is get a prenup.
  • #46
  • 13 July 2011 - 07:49 AM
Whats a prenup...don't answer that I just remembered

This post has been edited by Tensa Zangetsu: 13 July 2011 - 07:53 AM

  • #47
  • 13 July 2011 - 07:52 AM
If I felt I needed to get a prenup, I wouldn't marry the person. It shows a lack of trust in your partner, and if you can't trust them then why are you getting married to them in the first place?
  • #48
  • 13 July 2011 - 02:39 PM
  • Borg Lord
  • Talk shit about furries and see how mad I get!
    Member
For money? Sex? Crushing fear of being alone forever? Arranged marriage? Status symbol?
  • #49
  • 13 July 2011 - 09:23 PM
If you're getting married for money, why the hell would you get a prenup?
  • #50
  • 13 July 2011 - 09:34 PM
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