Bittersweet Candy Bowl Forums

Hello my friends...or whatever. My name is Glandor Trayce...and I write when I'm tired.
I created a crossover fanfiction between Transformers and BCB...God help me.
I was wondering if anyone was interested in reading this abomination, so I decided to post it here...


I have uploaded all of this to fan fiction.net in an attempt to streamline the initial post...thanks!

Bittersweet Transformers Chapter 1, a Transformers/Beast Wars + Bittersweet Candy Bowl Crossover fanfic | FanFiction

Please feel free to go after my writing and grammar skills...c:

This post has been edited by Glandor: 23 October 2012 - 01:13 PM

Thank god you didn't spell it 'Camero', or I would have had to kill you.

He figured they were all pets or something.
Waitaminute, that gives Cars a whole new definition of creepy. Many people are tied to them through bank loans, relying on them for transportation to work and school. huh.

a nearly ancient yellow Camaro with black racing stripes. Kind of a long name for this guy, but he didn’t really care.
Should have put the make of it in there, Chevrolet. Or, even though it only appeared on 67/69s, "Camaro By Chevrolet."

Paulo tried to find a way to turn the car off or brake or anything…every time he tried he’d get a jolt of 1 million volts of electricity
I'm no electrician but that is a bit far fetched.

It is fairly okay, but it has tons of small typos and the formatting is horrible. Use line breaks when speakers change, new paragraphs and such. Wall Of Texts are not easy to read.

Basically a rip on the Michael Bay film, which is alright I guess. But I'd like to see you take it in a different direction if you continue it.

This post has been edited by DLancer: 10 October 2012 - 12:11 PM

>_< That last part hurts ow...though I can see why you'd think that. It kinda starts out bayish. But yeah the formatting got messed up, originally it was in a word document and something got messed when I pasted it in...I won't make that mistake again.

Thanks for the feedback c:

Yeah, no problem. Clean it up and repost it. Always good to revise it.

If you have any questions about cars or Camaros I am sort of knowledgable, [insert image of die-cast Camaro signed by Scott Settlemire]. I have a pretty vague idea of some Transformers info as well, nowhere near some people though.

THe transformers info I have covered, I'm kind of a fanboy...the cars on the other hand I'm gonna be doing a lot of research on.

Well, just send me a pm with any questions you may have. I'm usually checking the site every now and again, so I should see it in a timely manner.

Plus I know where and how to look up what you need.

This post has been edited by DLancer: 10 October 2012 - 12:30 PM

SuitCase, on 10 October 2012 - 03:14 PM, said:

Mystery Of Convoy
I actually beat that game.

This post has been edited by DLancer: 10 October 2012 - 06:44 PM

WooHoo! Bitter-sweet candy bowl and Transformers!

Hey Everyone! I've got the second chapter...however I believe I'm going to come up with a better format for submission, does anyone have any suggestions?

Also, took the advice from before to heart, thanks for that...don't be afraid to tear it apart as it gets better! But still enjoy! But...yeah.

if you are a critic tear me apart, if you want entertainment, be entertained!

This post has been edited by Glandor: 19 October 2012 - 12:37 PM

Hey guys a new chapter has been uploaded and the destination for the fanfiction has also been updated to make the thread less cluttered!

I apologize in advance for the format of Chapter 2, I have not gone through it. However I imagine there are not as many typos this time...and more robots, less Bay.

thanks!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comma

-.-

Meanwhile (,) [sentence].

Ladies and gentlemen, chapter three! And it is actually the best yet in my opinion as I actually worked everyones' advice in...and the BCB cast(Or at least most of them) Are properly introduced. And things actually begin to happen.

Also if anyone ships Optimus x Yashy after this I will personally punt them to the moon.(This is a thing that happened with a friend, it's rather sad.)

So please...enjoy and critique c:

Glandor, on 23 October 2012 - 12:57 PM, said:

You know...that feeling when you're all like "MAN THIS CHAPTER IS COMING ALONG AWESOME" and then it's all like
*Squeak, pop, smoke*
Yeah...don't know when Chapter 4 will be up. >_>

Sorry to bump and I hope I'm not being irritating with this whole thing.