Bittersweet Candy Bowl Forums

As the Thread name says, sometimes inspiration comes to you and throws you it's crap at your face, and you chew that crap, and create some more crap that people likes (or dislikes).

Well, this is the spot where you can express in the old poetry way. It doesn't matter how long or short your work is, just let your soul go and write until your fingers bleed.

Constructive/destructive/supportive comments are welcome.

Mike:
Roses are red,
violets are blue
You're really pretty
I think I love you

Lucy:

Umm, seriously?
That's so cliche it's scary.
I am not impressed.

Paulo:

I knew that his poetry's cheezy;
But I wrote you something more sleazy.
To get you in bed
I'll limerick instead
'cause baby we know you're that easy


(for consistency, this is set right before 'Old Flame')

This post has been edited by Quaddy: 02 December 2010 - 12:22 AM

She smiles
And I undress her with my eyes
She laughs
And I’m naked with her
She looks at me
And my heart pounds
She smiles at me
And I orgasm
I really must get out more

"Are you still there?"
I do not know anymore
Come now and gone by
Was my dear sweet Lenore
I guess now I shall bar the door
And stay here--
Quoth the Raven "Forevermore"

Wondering about you (Reposting)
—————————-

I listen to your voice,
but I can’t hear anything.
I do wonder when you talk
if you expect others to listen,
but then why would you even try?

You show me a blank stare,
it’s so full of meaning,
though I wonder what it is.

I wonder whenever I look at you
if you can even see I’m here,
but deep inside
I already know the answer;
It sometimes makes me cry.

What’s the meaning behind your expressions?
I want to know the girl with those brown stripes,
wonder what you are really like.

Many times I have wished
to know more about you,
but then I think things through again
and I wonder,
would that ruin my idea of you?

But it’s not like it even matters
because you dont exist,
you will never hear my voice,
nor will I ever hear yours;
but most of the time I’m wondering…
what if you were real?

before anyone asks, i did not write this, and i do not mean it as offensive to anyone who is jewish.

Roses are reddish,
Violets are bluish,
If it wasn't for Christmas,
We'd all be Jewish!

*ehem*

I visited the IRC
it was during the mid-night-spree
A spree it was, you ask ? Why yes !
For idiots it was a success.

'cause all I wanted was relaxin'
sit in my chair while do some chattin'
Listen to some trivial stuff
But soon, oh, this was getting gruff

You ask, oh my, what did you see ?
I saw FANFICTION ! Dumb ! Oh gee !
As if that isn't bad enough
my god, I wish that I could laugh

about it, 'cause it was 'bout SEX !
full-written text, not limericks !
The characters we love and care for
they humped each other, an ongoing tour

Of things I thought i'd never see
I thought this place's childfriendly ?!? HEY !
What's wrong with you ? They are still kids
But all you care for are their - T**S ?!?

So well, like you propaply guessed
I left the chat and needed a rest
the net won't stop to amaze me
about how cruel mankind can be !

I just thought of this on a bike ride a few minutes ago:

One day in the future,
there will be no wars,
the sun will shine,
and drown out all the noise,
I do hold this to be true,
I do believe,
I do

One day in the future,
I might still be here,
the world will not,
have anything to fear,
I do really hope this is true,
I do believe,
I do

One day in the future,
there will just be light,
everyone can rest,
and know that everything's alright,
I do hope this is true,
I do believe,
I do

One day in the future,
I won't be around,
but I hope I left a smile,
instead of a frown,
could this please be true?
I do believe,
I do

I'm Trying to Read--A poem by Moddy (written some four years ago or so)

Thundering clouds, it’s a stormy night
Both rain and hail fall from mid-flight
It’s not very quiet either in or out
But still, only crazies would be out and about
I sit by the fire, alone with my book
I hear the hail at the window, dare I to look
I shalln’t look away, there’s nothing to see
But the noise continues on bothering me
It’s driving me mad, where’s my book mark
I put my book down to look into the dark
I can’t put my finger on it, but there’s something strange
I’m not sure what I’m seeing, perhaps I’m deranged
Lightning flashes and there’s nothing there
And I try to calm my standing hair
I retrieve my book and return to my page
The word I believe I left off on was "cage"
I hear a noise in the hall
It nearly causing me fall
Regaining my composure I go to check it out
I step into the hall and look all about
There’s nothing and there’s nobody
Although you’d consider me somebody
But I am the only person here
My mind’s playing tricks I can’t help but fear
I return to my room and pick up my book
I see my cat is giving me a look
“Don’t give me that look,” I quietly say
She just slowly turns and walks away
Rolling my eyes I return to my page
I’ve yet to read past the word "cage"
Something furry’s in my lap, I wonder what’s occurring
My cat’s rubbing against me and affectionately purring
While I love my cat, I’m trying to read
If she’s smart, then my warning she’ll heed
“Off of me,” I say in an annoyed tone
But she just won’t leave me alone
“Alright, you win,” I reluctantly say
While I set my book down to lay
"For only tonight, you I shall follow
But I’m going to read my book tomorrow"

One lesson I have learned,

While straining my young eyes.

Don't be afraid of the dark,

Be afraid of what it hides...

This post has been edited by Jake: 18 December 2010 - 04:43 AM

I wrote this for my girlfriend some months back, never gave it to her, and I don't really plan to

As the years pass by in the cool of night
I woke in a sweat from a terrible fright
I dreamed of a world where all was blue
No care, no smiles, no cheers, no you.

My face was streaked with tears un-numbered
The world was filled with hearts that hungered
And sitting in my bed alone
was me, my heart, i should have known.

the tables turned to face my fear
and even when your face got near
it vanished quick, without a trace
with me lost now, without a place

some see a river, some see the sky
but if love could be, it would not be high
nor low nor close, nor red nor blue,
If my love took an image, it would be you.

A loving smile, a warm embrace
when beauty shines, I see your face
the curse of love, it never stops
to make you glow when my heart hops

Along a road I ran to you
my face and features, turning blue
for none could smell the wonderous sweet
that came from when our hearts did meet

yet maybe i hunger for something more
maybe my heart will still remain poor
for the love in my eyes and the love in your heart
makes me smile with every start

and the smiles i see from so far away
are with me until the end of the day
so when we next our paths do finally meet
whether it be at home or in the street

I'll ask you to smile, nothing more, nothing less
for that smile is alike to the sweetest caress
and should you deny me even this small ask
I know that my heart has failed me this task

of finding my way, through traps and dangers
through miles of stone, past miles of strangers
to find my way here, back where I belong
with someone to hold, someone who is strong

the cold winds and the eternal flame
of colliding hearts should not be there to blame
for the sorrow i feel every time you leave me
alone with my heart to be gone, leave me be.

If one smile could make the yellow sun rise,
the one light to finally open my eyes
the light would come from only one single place
the face of an angel, loves face, your face.

So don't hide your eyes, don't leave in despair
know that even when you're alone, I will care
I'd fight off an army just to be in your arms
and until my death I'd protect you from all harms

just to see your sweet smile, brush the hair from your face
with nowhere to run, no future, no place
but here in your arms, together and alone
and right now your smile makes this place feel like home.

So Poetry uh? I should give it a try then.


Bella Rosa (Beautiful Rose, or Beauty Rose in short)


You are white with a hue of pink,
of her heart, you are the key
you are the secret that remains
in the silence, of her and me.

Oh white rose, so fragile,
you represent her spirit beauty
of her mind, of her heart,
of her perfect body.

So delightful is to see you exist,
you remind me of her face,
every curve and silhouette
your are perfect in every sense.

But as time passes by, you start running dry,
Im scared that I will lose you
your petals are falling now...
I dont want to say you good bye.

But I know you cant cheat death,
not now, not even a beautiful rose
but maybe this prose,
this prose might cheat the death.

I dont want to lose you, beauty rose...
as a lost her in a second without looking her...
she laid there after she was gone,
her body in that restful pose,
of sleep.... of eternal sleep....


I probably sucked. Please comment.

Inspired by calvin and hobbes:

'He creeps when you are sleeping
He creeps when you're awake
He knows if you've been bad or good
but he creeps for creeping's sake'

I have some,
But I ain't telling no one.

Take me to a place long forgotten by the sun, the moon, and the stars.
Take me to a place so far away from these city lights and cars.
Take me down to the tunnels that human hands have made
And let me rest down there within its ghost-like shade.

I was just about to post this outside of the thread...

"Pathways"

[This is the end]
I can heed the future.
Our lives going about under directed paths
Like an avalanche, not wanting (but consuming)
Never wanting (but always destroying)
Misinterpreting our place—I can heed the future.

Dying to live: we are all living to die.
Never thinking about the end,
Until we look up from our feet
Into plethoric horizons.
I will drive this life into the sun,
Never to pretend that I didn't know where I was going.

*Ninja, on 07 January 2011 - 02:33 AM, said:

This is pretty well done--the message and rhythm. The messaged being quite literally to escape society into the underground, or stoically remove oneself from it.
The repetition of "take me [to]" originally shied me away from reading, but is actually effectively used and makes the poem enjoyable. The Rhymes were also very well set and do not seem forced. It allows for a smooth rhythm for reading. Good poem.

"Pathways"

A very interesting poem. You seem to have a semi-pessimistic view of life. While we certainly all must face the same destination, no matter the route we travel to it, you seem to neglect the things along the way. The comparison of life to an avalanche is a tad drastic, but it does convey your point quite well. While cynical in nature, the poem is quite powerful in its content.

And thank you for your critique of my own poem. It was a five-minute affair when I just had an idea for one. I'm glad that you like it.

I think the overall message was helped because I did neglect the road to one's eventual death. This is because life, when viewed from such a far away angle, seems to be meaningless in the end. I have a preceding poem, "The End" which views life on the inside, valuing the journey to the end (it was originally one poem). I just wanted to see both angles when I wrote it. Should have posted it too, but I did a poor job on the first poem. It's sad, because it really is very dark when I didn't intend it to be so. ;/

Thanks for looking through it. Yours was too good to pass up.

Annomaniac, on 09 December 2010 - 10:13 PM, said:

You sir, win the internet.

Finally you have fallen, though for many dying years you stood.
I knew there had to come a time when you'd be gone for good.
But even I was shocked to find you dead upon the earth;
Lying there, so still and so near your place of birth.

Apple Tree, oh Apple Tree,
I sing a song for thee,
For my eyes have tired of bitter tears
That flow into the sea.

Your branches now are brittle, your trunk now full of worms,
But as from the ground you sprouted, to the ground you shall return.
Your fruit has been devoured and not a single seed still lives.
This world is a cruel one that takes all from he who gives.

Apple Tree, oh Apple Tree,
I sing a song for thee,
For my eyes are sore from bitter tears
That overflow the sea.

No more shall I smell the blossoms that adorned you every Spring.
Nor shall I taste the apples that every Autumn used to bring.
But gazing from your rotten hulk, I look around and see
The hills that do surround me are filled with Apple Trees.

Apple Tree, oh Apple Tree,
I sing a song for thee.
May your faithful soul find rest
Wherever it may be.

Basics and demonstrations
Of Socialising for too long
Psalms and scriptures
Music without song
Definitions indefinitely indefinite
Screaming words without meaning
Sadly Infinite
Personality Disorder
personally perfectly okay
Denying negativity
like punching a friend and expecting him to stay
Friendship lost in Love and Life
I told her i loved her so she laughed and turned the knife
Recognising mistakes
i jumped off this carousel
and into my personal hell

No thing is new,
every thing is old.
In particular; From you,
I've heard it ten-fold.

EDIT: New poem! It's a limerick.

I have an unbelievable uncle named Willem
He gives clients interesting invoices to bill 'em:
"I'm an exotic animal farmer,
herding alpacas and llama
to be used in movies and film"

This post has been edited by skmojo: 17 November 2011 - 02:46 AM

I don't think you know how limericks work.

Limericks are not required to be dirty, it's just recommended. Although I'm not entirely a fan of the loose rhymes and the fact that lines three and four are not significantly shorter.

I didn't mean content, the flow was just terrible.

I agree. That's partially why I posted the other first.
I have now changed it a bit.

Edit: 'nother one.

Truth is a slippery tar pit
you can't get out once your in.
If you do go inside
I think you'll find
things are as shit
they've always been.

This post has been edited by skmojo: 17 November 2011 - 01:49 PM

His condescending smile
Rips through my very soul
tear by tear
piece by piece
limb by limb.

His words impale me,
the sword rusty and broken
as it screams the truth.

And though I think it wasn't my fault,
I know now what you were trying to say.

It wasn't worth it...

Was it?

_______________

I once knew a man named Jin,
Who committed the most terrible sin...
He shot a man named Fred,
Right smack in the head,
And stabbed him again and again.

This post has been edited by Shada: 17 November 2011 - 03:10 AM

I wrote a sonnet today
enjoy


when the dawn breaks new
i'm glad to see your countenance
i hope you feel the same too
despite my morning appearance

when i recieve your affection
i feel i could take flight
perhaps we've reached perfection
although not without a fight

when we were separated
both of us were changed
and though that time was hated
our feelings have been exchanged

Now is our encore
with eternity to love you more.

Well that's a very modern interpretation of the form "Sonnet," having dropped all rhyme and meter.

I've noticed it's not what poems say themselves, but what reflections they stir up in the minds of the viewer. For example, had I read this poem 6 months ago, I would have thought nothing of it. Now when I read it, my mind is racked with pain and loss. Not because of what the poem puts into me, but what it takes out of me.

This post has been edited by Dr. Klaus: 08 March 2012 - 03:39 AM

That is exactly what poetry is, and it's also why it leads to so many different interpretations

And I often chopp the shit out of poetry, my rhythm becomes more like... The songs of Solomon (aka, no rhythm)

*bumps and hopes no one kills her*

What is it about me, that makes me, "me"?

Is it the convoluted branches on a family tree?

The color of my eyes, or the shine of my shoes?

Or the times that I smile or get stuck in the blues?

Am I changed with each small decision I make?

Or is it all predetermined, my choices all fake?

Am I more or less than the sum of my parts?

Does it even matter in the depths of my hearts?

Do I live? Am I dead? What makes up me?

Will I ever figure myself out correctly?