Now that I've looked through this topic again I've realised I've acted like a colossal dick.
Sorry about that.
A Little Inspiration
- #51
- 01 March 2011 - 04:06 PM
Okay well, here we go.
It's in bad quality because it's in pencil and, well, you know.

Ugh, it was just a 'vent my feelings' type piece.
Of course, no offence to Taeshi and her views or anyone and theirs. I'm not saying it's a bad idea, but I'm against it. And all creations belong to their respective artists. No animals were harmed in the making.
It's in bad quality because it's in pencil and, well, you know.

Ugh, it was just a 'vent my feelings' type piece.
Of course, no offence to Taeshi and her views or anyone and theirs. I'm not saying it's a bad idea, but I'm against it. And all creations belong to their respective artists. No animals were harmed in the making.
- #52
- 01 March 2011 - 06:45 PM
Woah.It's came really nice,for the 1 time 
Some training and it came be improve
*cheers*
off topic*
Apologise accepted.
Some training and it came be improve
*cheers*
SoulFish, on 01 March 2011 - 04:06 PM, said:
Now that I've looked through this topic again I've realised I've acted like a colossal dick.
Sorry about that.
Sorry about that.
off topic*
Apologise accepted.
This post has been edited by Raxki: 01 March 2011 - 06:53 PM
- #53
- 01 March 2011 - 06:55 PM
You've got a nice style. This is definitely a good start to your artistic career; keep it up and don't be afraid to flaunt what you've got. This, certainly, is nothing to be ashamed of
- #54
- 01 March 2011 - 07:22 PM
Harry reminds me of SuitCase
- #55
- 01 March 2011 - 10:33 PM
RedJack, on 01 March 2011 - 02:16 PM, said:
Hmm never considered crossover possibility. K Raxki I apologize for assuming things. As I've said before I like your drawings so keep going 
oh did not see this.
Apologise accepted
- #56
- 01 March 2011 - 11:39 PM
@Nturtanyr: Very clever, I like it.
- #57
- 02 March 2011 - 12:09 AM
Lol I'm allot like Harry. I just want to see Lucy happy but I think he exaggerates a bit with the thing with Paulo. I want Lucy to be happy with anybody she feels she can actually be happy with. This may or may not be due to the fact that I'm often a sucker for cheesy endings
- #58
- 03 March 2011 - 11:09 PM
I decided it would be a waste of space to post a new topic for this. So I'm reusing my old topic. The title still works for now anyway.
I'm usually a pretty good writer, but when writing fanfiction with already apparent personalities, it gets hard to get in their head. And with my first attempt, I plunged into territory that a writer knows doesn't work well. I looked through a few of the fanfics already up and found many aren't exactly able to coincide with the canon. In fact, it was usually the characters put into different situations. In which I realised, I had forgotten that it's always best to write what you know about. I borrowed a few things from stories and ideas I've had before, and now I present to you a fanfiction by me. Hopefully, it will be well received, but if you have any criticisms, I will work to improve on my later chapters with it.
So basically, this is something I don't think has been done yet (for good reason).
---
Chapter One: ‘Best Idea Ever’
‘Tess, just because it’s top of the range, doesn’t make testing it is a good idea,’ said Abbey, very wary of its effects.
‘Abbey, come one, it’ll be fun!’ said Tess in response.
‘Scaredy human!’ chanted Paulo.
‘That was the worst pun ever. Never use it again,’ said David.
‘Trust me, if they alpha test this stuff, they’d have written out any bugs. We’ll be fine,’ said Tess regardless.
Abbey folded his arms, annoyed they weren’t paying attention. When you volunteer to beta test a game system, that used virtual headsets, you know that something will go wrong.
‘Yeah Abbey, we’ll get stuck in the game, it’ll turn deadly and we’ll struggle to finish it before we all die,’ said Mike, sarcastically.
‘Popular culture is very unrealistic in contrast to reality,’ said McCain, for some reason also invited.
‘I’m going to beat the crap out of you in this Mike!’ called Lucy.
‘Okay, are we all ready?’ commanded Tess.
‘This game’s called ‘Elementary: The Theory Unleashed’. It makes me want to punch the designers,’ said Paulo, reading the cover of the box.
‘Shouldn’t we read the manual?’ asked Mike.
‘Shove it. Games always have tutorials,’ said Tess.
‘Abbey? Are you going to play?’ asked Daisy.
Abbey waned. He wasn’t about to just leave Daisy alone with…well Paulo and David were surely not going to be able to handle the thing seriously if it did fall into a perilous situation. And her eyes were too much for him to resist.
‘Alright. Pass me a helmet,’ said Abbey, reluctantly, though a smile did flicker across his mouth.
‘Okay, everyone got their helmets?’ said Tess.
Lucy picked hers up, as did Mike. Paulo was at the ready, Jasmine beside him. David had his, so did Sue, and Abbey, Daisy, Tess, Amaya and McCain.
‘Ready? Put them on, and I’ll start it up!’ said Tess.
Everyone dropped on their helmets, and the world turned to black. There was a silent buzz until Tess pushed the ‘on’ button, and there was a shocking zap of energy. Everyone yelped…most of them yelped. David yelped about ten seconds later. And as the energy tapped into the spines of everyone, there was a full blast of light and electricity, sending a wipe over everyone’s mind. They were blind.
It took a few seconds for everyone’s sight to return. And when it did, they couldn’t believe their eyes. A vast field scattered over the hills in front, housing clumps of trees that sprouted variably and erratically. There were long lines of pines and oaks, as well as the grand expanse of grass flowing like a sea.
‘It’s beautiful!’ admitted Abbey, alongside Daisy.
‘HD rendering. Nice…’ said Paulo.
‘I can’t believe WOAH!’ cried out Tess in surprise, who had just looked down at her clothing.
They had all been suddenly dressed in fantasy attire, and Tess was wearing a tight mini-skirt that seemed a little inappropriate. Also, a somewhat tight shirt. Daisy had on a dress of medium length next to Abbey, who was wearing a smart waistcoat of sorts. Paulo was dressed as the knight, with matching cape and majesty, with Jasmine, who had clothing comparable to pirates’ wear, but more land based. McCain was dressed quite darkly, in a cloak, and Sue was wearing a rather dashing set of clothes, whilst Amaya wore an outfit more adhered to a maid’s selection of wear. Except a little more adventuristic. And David was dressed in, a little over the top clothing, most suited to a gentleman.
‘Ooh! Top hat!’ he said, taking it off and shoving his hand inside, ‘now where’s that rabbit!’
‘Wow, Lucy!’ said Mike, admiring that her clothing seemed to have pictured her perfectly.
She was dressed in a dark dress and cloak that resembled her Halloween costume, except more practical. In fact, the after-blush reflex kick demonstrated it fully. Mike, meanwhile, was dressed in a nobleman’s outfit, gold buttons and all.
‘Very dashing,’ said McCain. He whisked his cloak for a bit.
‘Right, now what?’ said Sue.
All that was left for them was the field.
‘Um, don’t we get any instructions?’ asked Daisy.
‘Screw the rules, Tess has money!’ said David, running across the field towards the top of the nearest hill.
‘Should we stop him?’ asked Mike.
‘I think we’d better read the manual. None of us know what we’re doing,’ suggested Tess.
‘Okay. I’ll take my helmet off and-’ began Sue, but was interrupted by David.
‘Woah! Guys! Check this out!’ he yelled.
He was standing atop the hill. When everyone joined him, they revelled in the sight.
Below the hill, was a steep valley that dipped down so far into a fast-flowing river, and ran up the other side against a hard rocky face. And it was upon that cliff that stretched up high, that stood tall the large stone walls, housing behind them an unseen wonder. All below, were fields carefully ploughed and hoed by the working peasants.
‘Very majestic,’ noted Abbey.
‘I wouldn’t mind if only this was the game!’ said Daisy in admiration.
‘No fighting monsters!? Crap! Let’s find some zombies or something!’ said Paulo. Jasmine cheered in affirmation.
‘Should we go visit that castle?’ asked David.
‘That cliff’s way too steep to climb up,’ said Mike.
‘So what do we do? Shouldn’t there be a tutorial or some guy giving some explanation?’ said Jasmine, piping up.
‘I think it might be a glitch. Maybe the disc isn’t loading properly?’ suggested Lucy.
‘It’s probably a cut scene,’ said McCain.
‘A cut scene?’ questioned Tess.
‘Could it possibly be that this is the part of the game where we’re meant to watch, not play?’ said McCain.
Everyone froze on the spot. There were glances about. Amaya dusted herself off.
‘So when is this cut scene going to-’
‘BEHOLD!’
‘Years ago, a great force rose from the depths of the Kingdom of Mordirs. The South-Westerns had finished their work, and from within its powerful boundaries had rose the greatest evils from the lowest levels of Hell.’
‘Oh great. Another plot involving some evil kingdom trying to conquer the world using “ancient magic”,’ said Paulo sarcastically.
‘And so the South-Westerns charged, full throttle, at every other nation upon the earth.’
‘Can anyone else hear a whistling?’ said Sue.
Mike looked up, and saw a careering ball of fire falling through the sky. Everyone else felt the heat radiating from it as it soared overhead, and engulfed the castle, causing a large explosion of flames in a roar. Daisy gasped in shock as the farmers burnt to crisps, and the valley set alight. Trees toppled. Boulders fell. Screams echoed around and Daisy fell onto Abbey’s shoulder.
‘And then there was trouble. Because as soon as Mordirs invaded the coast of Lvynge, then everyone else responded in rage.’
‘Hey look! Wolves!’ shouted David.
Across the field, goblins riding wolves dashed over the valley towards a group of cloaked figures, burning the surviving farmers. And then from the castle came a set of cavalry, launching an ambush from within the burning walls.
‘It became a time of chaos. A time of uncertainty. Still, the problem is unresolved. And this is because there is no force of good and force of bad. All do what is best for themselves and their people. And now this is where we begin our journey…’
Yells and screams wavered over the hill, and a group of barbarians rode into the company. They flailed their clubs and arrows. One knocked both Amaya and Sue down into a net. McCain ran to try and pull them out. Another tried hitting Lucy, but she was quick enough to dodge it and let Mike get hit instead.
‘Mike!’
‘Stop them!’
‘What’re they doing?’
Paulo tried protecting Jasmine, pulling one barbarian of his horse and tried taking his club, but one archer had fired tranquilizing darts in to both his and Jasmine’s necks. David fell to a club’s blow. Abbey and Daisy both were caught by tranquilisers with Tess and Lucy soon after.
McCain was helpless. He threw his cloak back and stood in the middle of the circle three of the barbarians had made. As they got closer, he stepped back into the barbarian behind him, holding a dart.
Within seconds, his eyes quivered and shivered, before dropping closed and he fell unconscious.
*
When again his eyes flicked open, he didn’t feel tired, and woke in a bed. In fact, he felt refreshed. As if all his hit points had returned. Two beds down was Mike, lying either asleep or unconscious. He has his arm in a sling and he was frowning. As if he was having a bad dream. McCain sat up, and found that Paulo was opposite him, on his side, drooling off the bed. He sighed. He found his cloak was hanging up beside the bed.
The ward was a stone room, with beds made of something fluffy. There were other people in the room, mostly sick men. All with bloody injuries, oddly enough.
McCain tried getting out, but found his leg ached a lot more than it usually should. He whipped off his cover and found that he had a splint attached to his broken leg. And it had now begun to burn in agony. He leaned back and tried not to think about it.
‘Hey McCain. Sleep much?’ said David.
McCain looked round and found the not-very-gentleman. He had his clothes on again, but his right hand was sporting a strange glove made of silver.
‘David…your hand…it isn’t-’
‘It’s my awesome 5+ attachment! Those barbarians sure were rough bunch, so I lost my arm. Instead, I has a robot’s one!’
He pulled down his sleeve and to show off the fancy metalwork making up his hand.
‘I’m like an alchemist, right!?’
‘David, I hope this world doesn’t affect our reality. Else you are going to be in so much pain when we get AAAAAAH!’ cried out McCain trying to get up, waking Paulo in mid-snore.
‘Don’t call me Daddy! Huh, what?’
Paulo slipped into reality and found himself sitting up. He, also, felt no need for sleep.
‘Where’d we go? Didn’t barbarians-’ his eyes shot open, ‘Jasmine! Lucy! TESS!’
He jumped out of bed, but fell to the floor. Although he hadn’t any injuries, it was hard getting used to hand-eye coordination in a sub-reality. Even if it was leg-floor.
‘Calm down, they’re in the girls’ ward down a floor,’ said David.
‘How d’you kn-WOAH! Nice add-on Dave!’ he said.
‘I’m almost full-metal,’ he said proudly.
‘Okay, stop with references,’ said McCain.
‘Where’re the girls Dave?’ asked Paulo.
‘Downstairs. Other ward. But boys aren’t allowed in. Hospital rules, yada yada yada…’
‘How did we get here?’ wondered Paulo aloud, hoping David would answer.
Which he did; ‘we were rescued by some guys on a patrol.’
‘How do you know that!? What have I missed?’ said Paulo impatiently.
‘Tess was delivered a letter from some dude explaining some stuff. Not very interesting, so I came back up here and got in my clothes again!’ explained David.
‘Okay, back-up there. Letter!?’ exclaimed Paulo.
‘What did it say?’ asked McCain.
‘Something about how we got here. What to do next,’ recalled David.
‘We’d better read it then. Let’s go!’ said Paulo, caught in the moment.
‘Hold it. Where’s Abbey?’ said McCain.
‘Wasn’t here when I woke up,’ said David.
They looked over at the rest of the ward. Only them and a few other sick men were lying in beds…and Mike of course. But Abbey was missing.
‘That pansy probably quit the game,’ said Paulo.
‘I hope you’re right Paulo,’ said McCain.
‘And welcome to the game, my adventurers!’
---
If no one has nothing to say, I will take that as the signal to carry on. It's what I do back home.
I'm usually a pretty good writer, but when writing fanfiction with already apparent personalities, it gets hard to get in their head. And with my first attempt, I plunged into territory that a writer knows doesn't work well. I looked through a few of the fanfics already up and found many aren't exactly able to coincide with the canon. In fact, it was usually the characters put into different situations. In which I realised, I had forgotten that it's always best to write what you know about. I borrowed a few things from stories and ideas I've had before, and now I present to you a fanfiction by me. Hopefully, it will be well received, but if you have any criticisms, I will work to improve on my later chapters with it.
So basically, this is something I don't think has been done yet (for good reason).
---
Chapter One: ‘Best Idea Ever’
‘Tess, just because it’s top of the range, doesn’t make testing it is a good idea,’ said Abbey, very wary of its effects.
‘Abbey, come one, it’ll be fun!’ said Tess in response.
‘Scaredy human!’ chanted Paulo.
‘That was the worst pun ever. Never use it again,’ said David.
‘Trust me, if they alpha test this stuff, they’d have written out any bugs. We’ll be fine,’ said Tess regardless.
Abbey folded his arms, annoyed they weren’t paying attention. When you volunteer to beta test a game system, that used virtual headsets, you know that something will go wrong.
‘Yeah Abbey, we’ll get stuck in the game, it’ll turn deadly and we’ll struggle to finish it before we all die,’ said Mike, sarcastically.
‘Popular culture is very unrealistic in contrast to reality,’ said McCain, for some reason also invited.
‘I’m going to beat the crap out of you in this Mike!’ called Lucy.
‘Okay, are we all ready?’ commanded Tess.
‘This game’s called ‘Elementary: The Theory Unleashed’. It makes me want to punch the designers,’ said Paulo, reading the cover of the box.
‘Shouldn’t we read the manual?’ asked Mike.
‘Shove it. Games always have tutorials,’ said Tess.
‘Abbey? Are you going to play?’ asked Daisy.
Abbey waned. He wasn’t about to just leave Daisy alone with…well Paulo and David were surely not going to be able to handle the thing seriously if it did fall into a perilous situation. And her eyes were too much for him to resist.
‘Alright. Pass me a helmet,’ said Abbey, reluctantly, though a smile did flicker across his mouth.
‘Okay, everyone got their helmets?’ said Tess.
Lucy picked hers up, as did Mike. Paulo was at the ready, Jasmine beside him. David had his, so did Sue, and Abbey, Daisy, Tess, Amaya and McCain.
‘Ready? Put them on, and I’ll start it up!’ said Tess.
Everyone dropped on their helmets, and the world turned to black. There was a silent buzz until Tess pushed the ‘on’ button, and there was a shocking zap of energy. Everyone yelped…most of them yelped. David yelped about ten seconds later. And as the energy tapped into the spines of everyone, there was a full blast of light and electricity, sending a wipe over everyone’s mind. They were blind.
It took a few seconds for everyone’s sight to return. And when it did, they couldn’t believe their eyes. A vast field scattered over the hills in front, housing clumps of trees that sprouted variably and erratically. There were long lines of pines and oaks, as well as the grand expanse of grass flowing like a sea.
‘It’s beautiful!’ admitted Abbey, alongside Daisy.
‘HD rendering. Nice…’ said Paulo.
‘I can’t believe WOAH!’ cried out Tess in surprise, who had just looked down at her clothing.
They had all been suddenly dressed in fantasy attire, and Tess was wearing a tight mini-skirt that seemed a little inappropriate. Also, a somewhat tight shirt. Daisy had on a dress of medium length next to Abbey, who was wearing a smart waistcoat of sorts. Paulo was dressed as the knight, with matching cape and majesty, with Jasmine, who had clothing comparable to pirates’ wear, but more land based. McCain was dressed quite darkly, in a cloak, and Sue was wearing a rather dashing set of clothes, whilst Amaya wore an outfit more adhered to a maid’s selection of wear. Except a little more adventuristic. And David was dressed in, a little over the top clothing, most suited to a gentleman.
‘Ooh! Top hat!’ he said, taking it off and shoving his hand inside, ‘now where’s that rabbit!’
‘Wow, Lucy!’ said Mike, admiring that her clothing seemed to have pictured her perfectly.
She was dressed in a dark dress and cloak that resembled her Halloween costume, except more practical. In fact, the after-blush reflex kick demonstrated it fully. Mike, meanwhile, was dressed in a nobleman’s outfit, gold buttons and all.
‘Very dashing,’ said McCain. He whisked his cloak for a bit.
‘Right, now what?’ said Sue.
All that was left for them was the field.
‘Um, don’t we get any instructions?’ asked Daisy.
‘Screw the rules, Tess has money!’ said David, running across the field towards the top of the nearest hill.
‘Should we stop him?’ asked Mike.
‘I think we’d better read the manual. None of us know what we’re doing,’ suggested Tess.
‘Okay. I’ll take my helmet off and-’ began Sue, but was interrupted by David.
‘Woah! Guys! Check this out!’ he yelled.
He was standing atop the hill. When everyone joined him, they revelled in the sight.
Below the hill, was a steep valley that dipped down so far into a fast-flowing river, and ran up the other side against a hard rocky face. And it was upon that cliff that stretched up high, that stood tall the large stone walls, housing behind them an unseen wonder. All below, were fields carefully ploughed and hoed by the working peasants.
‘Very majestic,’ noted Abbey.
‘I wouldn’t mind if only this was the game!’ said Daisy in admiration.
‘No fighting monsters!? Crap! Let’s find some zombies or something!’ said Paulo. Jasmine cheered in affirmation.
‘Should we go visit that castle?’ asked David.
‘That cliff’s way too steep to climb up,’ said Mike.
‘So what do we do? Shouldn’t there be a tutorial or some guy giving some explanation?’ said Jasmine, piping up.
‘I think it might be a glitch. Maybe the disc isn’t loading properly?’ suggested Lucy.
‘It’s probably a cut scene,’ said McCain.
‘A cut scene?’ questioned Tess.
‘Could it possibly be that this is the part of the game where we’re meant to watch, not play?’ said McCain.
Everyone froze on the spot. There were glances about. Amaya dusted herself off.
‘So when is this cut scene going to-’
‘BEHOLD!’
‘Years ago, a great force rose from the depths of the Kingdom of Mordirs. The South-Westerns had finished their work, and from within its powerful boundaries had rose the greatest evils from the lowest levels of Hell.’
‘Oh great. Another plot involving some evil kingdom trying to conquer the world using “ancient magic”,’ said Paulo sarcastically.
‘And so the South-Westerns charged, full throttle, at every other nation upon the earth.’
‘Can anyone else hear a whistling?’ said Sue.
Mike looked up, and saw a careering ball of fire falling through the sky. Everyone else felt the heat radiating from it as it soared overhead, and engulfed the castle, causing a large explosion of flames in a roar. Daisy gasped in shock as the farmers burnt to crisps, and the valley set alight. Trees toppled. Boulders fell. Screams echoed around and Daisy fell onto Abbey’s shoulder.
‘And then there was trouble. Because as soon as Mordirs invaded the coast of Lvynge, then everyone else responded in rage.’
‘Hey look! Wolves!’ shouted David.
Across the field, goblins riding wolves dashed over the valley towards a group of cloaked figures, burning the surviving farmers. And then from the castle came a set of cavalry, launching an ambush from within the burning walls.
‘It became a time of chaos. A time of uncertainty. Still, the problem is unresolved. And this is because there is no force of good and force of bad. All do what is best for themselves and their people. And now this is where we begin our journey…’
Yells and screams wavered over the hill, and a group of barbarians rode into the company. They flailed their clubs and arrows. One knocked both Amaya and Sue down into a net. McCain ran to try and pull them out. Another tried hitting Lucy, but she was quick enough to dodge it and let Mike get hit instead.
‘Mike!’
‘Stop them!’
‘What’re they doing?’
Paulo tried protecting Jasmine, pulling one barbarian of his horse and tried taking his club, but one archer had fired tranquilizing darts in to both his and Jasmine’s necks. David fell to a club’s blow. Abbey and Daisy both were caught by tranquilisers with Tess and Lucy soon after.
McCain was helpless. He threw his cloak back and stood in the middle of the circle three of the barbarians had made. As they got closer, he stepped back into the barbarian behind him, holding a dart.
Within seconds, his eyes quivered and shivered, before dropping closed and he fell unconscious.
*
When again his eyes flicked open, he didn’t feel tired, and woke in a bed. In fact, he felt refreshed. As if all his hit points had returned. Two beds down was Mike, lying either asleep or unconscious. He has his arm in a sling and he was frowning. As if he was having a bad dream. McCain sat up, and found that Paulo was opposite him, on his side, drooling off the bed. He sighed. He found his cloak was hanging up beside the bed.
The ward was a stone room, with beds made of something fluffy. There were other people in the room, mostly sick men. All with bloody injuries, oddly enough.
McCain tried getting out, but found his leg ached a lot more than it usually should. He whipped off his cover and found that he had a splint attached to his broken leg. And it had now begun to burn in agony. He leaned back and tried not to think about it.
‘Hey McCain. Sleep much?’ said David.
McCain looked round and found the not-very-gentleman. He had his clothes on again, but his right hand was sporting a strange glove made of silver.
‘David…your hand…it isn’t-’
‘It’s my awesome 5+ attachment! Those barbarians sure were rough bunch, so I lost my arm. Instead, I has a robot’s one!’
He pulled down his sleeve and to show off the fancy metalwork making up his hand.
‘I’m like an alchemist, right!?’
‘David, I hope this world doesn’t affect our reality. Else you are going to be in so much pain when we get AAAAAAH!’ cried out McCain trying to get up, waking Paulo in mid-snore.
‘Don’t call me Daddy! Huh, what?’
Paulo slipped into reality and found himself sitting up. He, also, felt no need for sleep.
‘Where’d we go? Didn’t barbarians-’ his eyes shot open, ‘Jasmine! Lucy! TESS!’
He jumped out of bed, but fell to the floor. Although he hadn’t any injuries, it was hard getting used to hand-eye coordination in a sub-reality. Even if it was leg-floor.
‘Calm down, they’re in the girls’ ward down a floor,’ said David.
‘How d’you kn-WOAH! Nice add-on Dave!’ he said.
‘I’m almost full-metal,’ he said proudly.
‘Okay, stop with references,’ said McCain.
‘Where’re the girls Dave?’ asked Paulo.
‘Downstairs. Other ward. But boys aren’t allowed in. Hospital rules, yada yada yada…’
‘How did we get here?’ wondered Paulo aloud, hoping David would answer.
Which he did; ‘we were rescued by some guys on a patrol.’
‘How do you know that!? What have I missed?’ said Paulo impatiently.
‘Tess was delivered a letter from some dude explaining some stuff. Not very interesting, so I came back up here and got in my clothes again!’ explained David.
‘Okay, back-up there. Letter!?’ exclaimed Paulo.
‘What did it say?’ asked McCain.
‘Something about how we got here. What to do next,’ recalled David.
‘We’d better read it then. Let’s go!’ said Paulo, caught in the moment.
‘Hold it. Where’s Abbey?’ said McCain.
‘Wasn’t here when I woke up,’ said David.
They looked over at the rest of the ward. Only them and a few other sick men were lying in beds…and Mike of course. But Abbey was missing.
‘That pansy probably quit the game,’ said Paulo.
‘I hope you’re right Paulo,’ said McCain.
‘And welcome to the game, my adventurers!’
---
If no one has nothing to say, I will take that as the signal to carry on. It's what I do back home.
- #59
- 25 March 2011 - 06:28 PM
Nice. Fantasy is such a manipulative genre. So many things could happen that others can't explain. Nice story. I wonder what will happen next :3
- #60
- 26 March 2011 - 08:39 AM
Well thanks Red. I'm really grateful you responded. It may take a while to become recognised, but it took some time to become who I am on my other forum. A lot of unsuccessful fanfiction until I wrote my comedic pieces. I'll just patiently write this then.
---
Chapter 2: Unfortunate Inconveniences
Standing in the ward’s doorway was a Singapura in a set of white clothing. His robes were draped over him to create a cape that lay behind him, and it was so white that it made his fur look quite dirty. His eyes were piercing yellow. He had a smug look on his face when Paulo, David and McCain looked up at him.
‘Who are you?’ demanded Paulo.
‘No need to get defensive towards me. My name is Lucifer’.
‘That’s an unfortunate name,’ commented McCain.
‘Right, are you our “tutorial master” then?’ said Paulo sarcastically.
‘In a way, yes,’ replied Lucifer, ‘I like to be referred to as a Major Interactive NPC’.
‘Will these injuries affect us in reality, sir, because I don’t want a broken leg,’ said McCain.
‘Your body is not affected by the game. Only your brain is, but that rights itself when it finds your body perfectly healthy on the other side,’ explained Lucifer.
‘This conversation is really unrealistic. I’ve lost the mood,’ said McCain.
‘Ah, I’m the buffer as well, see? Else how would you know this still was a game? Anyhow, I do have a real reason for coming here,’ said Lucifer.
‘Uh, Sandy? Is that you?’ whimpered Mike, as he rolled over into somewhat consciousness.
‘Good timing! Now, I’m here to inform you of your odd predicament…’ Lucifer began.
‘Predicament?’ questioned Paulo.
‘Well, not all of you were rescued from those barbarians,’ said Lucifer nervously.
There were a couple of seconds of Lucifer’s nervous chuckles, before he cleared his throat.
‘Little trouble with co-ordination, and-‘
‘Who did we leave behind?’ asked Paulo.
'Er-'
'We left people behind? The...the barbaria-Lucy!' shouted Mike, remembering. It seemed the whack to the head had jolted a little extra, 'Lucy's okay, isn't she?'
‘I’m not familiar with any of your names, so we have a problem here already’.
‘Black dress? Deep blue eyes? Soft pure-white fur?’ described Paulo.
'She can be very...fierce,' said Mike.
‘Ah…her…’
*
She looked much more peaceful on a bed. Although she had her fists clenched, and her body tensed, her face was relaxed and her breathing was slow and steady. Mike knew it was a game, but seeing her in a state like that…he felt a tug of pain, but didn’t want to show it.
‘She woke up earlier than the rest of you. Much earlier; in the middle of battle really. She was so intent of getting you free,” said Lucifer, indicating Mike, ‘and that’s the reason why your arm’s as such. She succeeded, but then she was hit. And now…’
Mike felt the urge to hug her, but found it a bad idea.
‘What’s it like to be asleep in this game?’ he asked.
‘Um, I would expect like normal sleep. Except, this proves a problem for the rest of you’.
‘Why?’
‘Well, turning the power off the game when asleep…is disallowed. It causes the brain to malfunction in a way and she’d switch realities,’ explained Lucifer.
‘Switch realities?’ said Mike.
‘She’d think reality as dream. Not a good thing, as our alpha tests have shown. You’ll have to wake her up before you even think of turning me off,’ said Lucifer.
‘This is more unrealistic than anything I’ve ever seen,’ commented McCain.
‘How do we do that?’ demanded Paulo.
‘That’s something else you should worry about,’ said Lucifer.
‘You’re the Major NPC guy! You should know!” shouted Mike.
‘Hey, I’m a buffer! And this isn’t my expertise! I’m a wizard, which means I work with magic. She’s been infected by poison. What you need is an Erphiologist,’ said Lucifer.
‘A what?’ said McCain.
‘An Erphiologist,’ said Lucifer.
‘Where do we find one of those?’ asked Paulo.
‘The best study at the Halian Approved National University, but there might be a few scattered about,’ said Lucifer.
‘Where’s that?’
‘Halia’.
‘…Where’s that?’
‘Quite far east. Through the Fatalland Desert and some other nations. Would take a while to get there,’ said Lucifer.
‘Hold on! Let me get this!’ said David, ‘we have to walk through a desert before we can go home? How long is this going to take!?’
‘The game speeds up your brain activity by a bit, so a day here is actually a few minutes in reality,’ assured Lucifer.
‘The science behind the game makes me want to die,’ said McCain.
‘Right, I think we should see the girls, and talk to them about this,’ suggested Mike, ‘we also have to save Abbey you know. We’ve got two problems now’.
‘Fine. Let’s go find them. Downstairs, right?’
*
The women’s ward was a little brighter. Allowance into it had been provided by Lucifer, by his “Seals”, which allowed them special privileges. Sue was sitting on her bed with a bandaged arm whilst Jasmine was sitting on her bed a little anxious. As soon as the four of them entered, there was a commotion.
‘PAULO!!’ shouted Jasmine, launching herself into him, arms open.
‘Mike! My goodness, what happened to your arm?’ exclaimed Sue.
‘Hey! Who’s been worried about me?’ said David.
‘Daisy, are you okay?’ called Mike from Sue’s embrace.
Daisy looked round. She had been sitting on the windowsill of the far wall. Through the window was a large field, cut off my hedges, and beyond that the edge of the hill. But in the field were hundreds of tents, with soldiers moving about of all shapes and sizes. Daisy’s eyes were red, as if she had been crying. Yet, she was smiling slightly as she saw Mike.
‘Mike, thank goodness. We had been very worried,’ she said, trying not to sound too upset as she got up and hugged him too.
‘You know about Abbey?’ said Mike.
‘Do you know about Lucy?’ replied Daisy.
‘Hey where’s Tess?’ asked Paulo.
‘With Abbey and Amaya,’ said Daisy, unfazed.
‘Tess and Amaya have been captured too!’ cried Paulo.
‘This is proving to be a pain,’ said McCain.
‘Are you going to be okay Daisy?’ asked Mike.
‘Of course! It’s only a game anyway. It just…feels so real,’ she said, and retreated from his arms. He could see that she had heeded Abbey’s warning unlike the rest of them. She had supported him. Something could go wrong; horribly, horribly wrong and she didn’t know if Abbey hadn’t been befallen by it yet.
‘So now we HAVE to save Abbey?” whined Paulo.
‘Paulo!’ said Mike.
‘Now that most of us are here, we need a plan,’ said McCain, ‘because of Lucy, we can’t get out the game until we wake her up. A very annoying inconvenience’.
‘Shut it McCain!’ shouted Mike.
‘He’s right though. We need a plan. We can’t blindly go looking for Abbey, Tess and Amaya without a proper set of plans and directions,’ said Sue.
‘We need a map. We know where to find Lucy’s cure, but we don’t know how to get there. We don’t know where to find Tess, Abbey and Amaya either. So we’ve got to find that out too,’ summarised Jasmine.
‘Yes! A map! They always have maps in chests, right?’ said Paulo.
‘A Cartographer is a producer of maps, but considering late RPG designers, we will not find one of them,’ said McCain.
‘This game’s looking less exciting and more just questing for stuff. Isn’t there any action?’ said David.
‘You spoke too soon,’ said a voice from the doorway.
Everyone’s head whipped round and faced the guardsman who had entered the ward; armour on and fully equipped.
‘Ladies and gentlemen, it’s necessary that you evacuate the monastery into the back gardens immediately,’ announced the guardsman.
‘Evacuate? Why?’ Sue repeated.
‘Incoming Solian Battalion. We need to move all civilians out of the area. We have to get you on the next ship when it arrives,’ said the guardsman, ‘and we don’t have much ti-‘
CRASH!
Dust flittered from the ceiling and the ground wobbled. The chandelier above shook.
‘Run!’ cried out Paulo.
He with Jasmine and David close behind dashed past the guardsman. The guardsman followed them and after came the rest of the company.
Another crash came, shaking the foundations, causing a mass rabble to emit from the fields outside. Mike was skipping steps, holding Daisy’s hand to keep her close. Sue was running behind them, and McCain was last in line, hopping on his stick as they ran in front.
Mike stopped dead in his tracks.
‘Lucy!’ he shouted, and dropped Daisy’s hand running up the stairs. Daisy called out, ‘Mike!’ but Sue pushed her ahead.
‘He’ll be alright. We need to go!’ Sue said.
Mike zoomed past McCain, ruffling his cloak. He jumped up the stairs as a large boulder crashed down the corridor he’d just ducked out of. The ceiling collapsed behind him, dropping stones and a chair onto the staircase. He slid across the next corridor, round a corner and into the second room.
There was Lucy, lying unconscious still. Mike glanced over her, working out the right way to pick her up, but realising there wasn’t time to be polite, he thrust his arms underneath her neck and knees, lifted her off the bed and ran back the other way.
Now a boulder ran straight through the corridor in front of him, creating a hole in the wall, causing the consequent collapse of the ceiling and room above it and blocking his path. He whisked the other way around, and ran down the next corridor, not paying attention to Lucy’s bouncing and bucking as he ran recklessly.
He found another staircase, and jumped down most of it, almost tripping, but kept his balance using Lucy. He took a right and found a window. A quick glimpse through the window revealed that the field was now being assaulted by a large army of sorts, with catapults lining its backline defence. All blue armour, like an ocean of swords.
Mike found that the next staircase was now half broken. Taking a running chance, and since he had no time, he leapt with most his might across. He managed to make it, with room to spare, but he lost his balance and fell flat on his back. He groaned in aching pain, and pulled himself back up, still holding Lucy.
He had reached the ground floor. Now he just needed to get to the back, right? A few more corners of rumbling and crashing, and he finally found the open doors to the outside. And when he ran out into the debris ridden grass, he slowed down in front of the magnificent object sitting before him.
A machine, that could’ve been associated with a rocket, was sitting on the grass, rumbling. Even as more boulders crashed around the field, Mike was astounded and confused by the vehicle with long peaked nose and three rocket jets at the end that howled. And a small ramp, folded out from a doorway, led the way inside of it.
‘Get in you fool!’ shouted the doorman, who had been waiting for Mike. Mike sprinted up the ramp and inside the thing with Lucy, and he found himself exhausted and coughing heavily. The dust was affecting his lungs. He almost collapsed, but knowing Lucy was still in his arms, he made himself keep upright.
‘Take her down the corridor there! Hurry! We’ve got to get out of here now!’ shouted the doorman, pulling up the ramp and pointing vaguely up the narrow path on the right.
Inside the rocket, it was furnished similar to the stereotypical submarine. The rivets holding the plates together were very visible and there were seats all around the first room, each with straps and bars to hold whoever sat in them in place. Down the corridor, there was another similar room with the company all in a seat each. All around were a few other men and women and children. As Mike stepped in, an attendant saw him and gasped.
‘My goodness, let me help you!’ she said, ‘I’ll put her in the medical office. You take a seat here’.
She slowly took Lucy off Mike. He felt so tired, he almost dropped her into the attendants arms. The attendant gave an assuring smile to him, and took him further on down the machine.
‘Mike, don’t do that ever again!’ yelled Daisy, and out of nowhere, pushing him.
‘What?’ exclaimed Mike.
‘Just running off like that! We were worried you could have been killed or-‘
‘It’s just a game! Why are you getting so upset?’ argued Mike.
‘A game!? Why did you run back for Lucy!?’ shouted Daisy.
Mike stopped, and his face fell. He understood. Daisy looked so angry, but she was crying so hard she couldn’t hold it back well enough, and what appeared on her face were the rivers of tears being directed all over by her screwed up anger.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said, hugging Daisy, as she began to cough on her tears.
‘You – you could’ve-‘ she tried to say.
This game was having too much of an affect already. Realism wasn’t the best thing.
‘Everyone take your seats and hold on! We’re getting out of here!’ yelled an attendant from up the craft. Mike led Daisy to her seat and they sat down. She continually wiped her eyes to stop crying. Mike glanced at everyone and glared at their stares. Paulo coughed and tried getting into a conversation with the others to draw away attention from Daisy.
‘So…now what?’ was the first thing that came out.
‘We’re in a “thing”, going “somewhere”,’ explained David.
‘So nothing is the answer,’ said Paulo.
‘I bet there’ll be something for us when we land. New NPC!’ said Jasmine.
‘Well they can’t leave us clueless on the first part of the game, can they?’ said Sue.
And at that precise moment, another attendant came into the section of the craft and called out, ‘I have something here for a company affiliated with Lucifer. Anyone know a Lucifer?’
None of the other civilians in the sector made any motion. Sue looked around the section oddly before she awkwardly raised her hand up halfway. The attendant passed her a large book with a note pinned to it. It was a relatively-new, hand-made book with straps and a hardcover. The note was written on parchment in calligraphy…with the ‘i’s dotted with hearts.
‘”Game Mechanics – Page 127” – “The World of Science: A Rendition of the Classic Disputes of the House of Masters”,’ Sue read from the note and book.
‘I have no idea whether that’s going to make things easier, or more complicated,’ said Paulo.
---
One annoying thing here; I'm combining three things very awkwardly, generating all sorts of conflictions, condradictions and explanations. Don't understand what something is? Tough. Unless it can be explained in the moment, it won't be explained. And that is the greatest flaw to overcome in fantasy writing.
---
Chapter 2: Unfortunate Inconveniences
Standing in the ward’s doorway was a Singapura in a set of white clothing. His robes were draped over him to create a cape that lay behind him, and it was so white that it made his fur look quite dirty. His eyes were piercing yellow. He had a smug look on his face when Paulo, David and McCain looked up at him.
‘Who are you?’ demanded Paulo.
‘No need to get defensive towards me. My name is Lucifer’.
‘That’s an unfortunate name,’ commented McCain.
‘Right, are you our “tutorial master” then?’ said Paulo sarcastically.
‘In a way, yes,’ replied Lucifer, ‘I like to be referred to as a Major Interactive NPC’.
‘Will these injuries affect us in reality, sir, because I don’t want a broken leg,’ said McCain.
‘Your body is not affected by the game. Only your brain is, but that rights itself when it finds your body perfectly healthy on the other side,’ explained Lucifer.
‘This conversation is really unrealistic. I’ve lost the mood,’ said McCain.
‘Ah, I’m the buffer as well, see? Else how would you know this still was a game? Anyhow, I do have a real reason for coming here,’ said Lucifer.
‘Uh, Sandy? Is that you?’ whimpered Mike, as he rolled over into somewhat consciousness.
‘Good timing! Now, I’m here to inform you of your odd predicament…’ Lucifer began.
‘Predicament?’ questioned Paulo.
‘Well, not all of you were rescued from those barbarians,’ said Lucifer nervously.
There were a couple of seconds of Lucifer’s nervous chuckles, before he cleared his throat.
‘Little trouble with co-ordination, and-‘
‘Who did we leave behind?’ asked Paulo.
'Er-'
'We left people behind? The...the barbaria-Lucy!' shouted Mike, remembering. It seemed the whack to the head had jolted a little extra, 'Lucy's okay, isn't she?'
‘I’m not familiar with any of your names, so we have a problem here already’.
‘Black dress? Deep blue eyes? Soft pure-white fur?’ described Paulo.
'She can be very...fierce,' said Mike.
‘Ah…her…’
*
She looked much more peaceful on a bed. Although she had her fists clenched, and her body tensed, her face was relaxed and her breathing was slow and steady. Mike knew it was a game, but seeing her in a state like that…he felt a tug of pain, but didn’t want to show it.
‘She woke up earlier than the rest of you. Much earlier; in the middle of battle really. She was so intent of getting you free,” said Lucifer, indicating Mike, ‘and that’s the reason why your arm’s as such. She succeeded, but then she was hit. And now…’
Mike felt the urge to hug her, but found it a bad idea.
‘What’s it like to be asleep in this game?’ he asked.
‘Um, I would expect like normal sleep. Except, this proves a problem for the rest of you’.
‘Why?’
‘Well, turning the power off the game when asleep…is disallowed. It causes the brain to malfunction in a way and she’d switch realities,’ explained Lucifer.
‘Switch realities?’ said Mike.
‘She’d think reality as dream. Not a good thing, as our alpha tests have shown. You’ll have to wake her up before you even think of turning me off,’ said Lucifer.
‘This is more unrealistic than anything I’ve ever seen,’ commented McCain.
‘How do we do that?’ demanded Paulo.
‘That’s something else you should worry about,’ said Lucifer.
‘You’re the Major NPC guy! You should know!” shouted Mike.
‘Hey, I’m a buffer! And this isn’t my expertise! I’m a wizard, which means I work with magic. She’s been infected by poison. What you need is an Erphiologist,’ said Lucifer.
‘A what?’ said McCain.
‘An Erphiologist,’ said Lucifer.
‘Where do we find one of those?’ asked Paulo.
‘The best study at the Halian Approved National University, but there might be a few scattered about,’ said Lucifer.
‘Where’s that?’
‘Halia’.
‘…Where’s that?’
‘Quite far east. Through the Fatalland Desert and some other nations. Would take a while to get there,’ said Lucifer.
‘Hold on! Let me get this!’ said David, ‘we have to walk through a desert before we can go home? How long is this going to take!?’
‘The game speeds up your brain activity by a bit, so a day here is actually a few minutes in reality,’ assured Lucifer.
‘The science behind the game makes me want to die,’ said McCain.
‘Right, I think we should see the girls, and talk to them about this,’ suggested Mike, ‘we also have to save Abbey you know. We’ve got two problems now’.
‘Fine. Let’s go find them. Downstairs, right?’
*
The women’s ward was a little brighter. Allowance into it had been provided by Lucifer, by his “Seals”, which allowed them special privileges. Sue was sitting on her bed with a bandaged arm whilst Jasmine was sitting on her bed a little anxious. As soon as the four of them entered, there was a commotion.
‘PAULO!!’ shouted Jasmine, launching herself into him, arms open.
‘Mike! My goodness, what happened to your arm?’ exclaimed Sue.
‘Hey! Who’s been worried about me?’ said David.
‘Daisy, are you okay?’ called Mike from Sue’s embrace.
Daisy looked round. She had been sitting on the windowsill of the far wall. Through the window was a large field, cut off my hedges, and beyond that the edge of the hill. But in the field were hundreds of tents, with soldiers moving about of all shapes and sizes. Daisy’s eyes were red, as if she had been crying. Yet, she was smiling slightly as she saw Mike.
‘Mike, thank goodness. We had been very worried,’ she said, trying not to sound too upset as she got up and hugged him too.
‘You know about Abbey?’ said Mike.
‘Do you know about Lucy?’ replied Daisy.
‘Hey where’s Tess?’ asked Paulo.
‘With Abbey and Amaya,’ said Daisy, unfazed.
‘Tess and Amaya have been captured too!’ cried Paulo.
‘This is proving to be a pain,’ said McCain.
‘Are you going to be okay Daisy?’ asked Mike.
‘Of course! It’s only a game anyway. It just…feels so real,’ she said, and retreated from his arms. He could see that she had heeded Abbey’s warning unlike the rest of them. She had supported him. Something could go wrong; horribly, horribly wrong and she didn’t know if Abbey hadn’t been befallen by it yet.
‘So now we HAVE to save Abbey?” whined Paulo.
‘Paulo!’ said Mike.
‘Now that most of us are here, we need a plan,’ said McCain, ‘because of Lucy, we can’t get out the game until we wake her up. A very annoying inconvenience’.
‘Shut it McCain!’ shouted Mike.
‘He’s right though. We need a plan. We can’t blindly go looking for Abbey, Tess and Amaya without a proper set of plans and directions,’ said Sue.
‘We need a map. We know where to find Lucy’s cure, but we don’t know how to get there. We don’t know where to find Tess, Abbey and Amaya either. So we’ve got to find that out too,’ summarised Jasmine.
‘Yes! A map! They always have maps in chests, right?’ said Paulo.
‘A Cartographer is a producer of maps, but considering late RPG designers, we will not find one of them,’ said McCain.
‘This game’s looking less exciting and more just questing for stuff. Isn’t there any action?’ said David.
‘You spoke too soon,’ said a voice from the doorway.
Everyone’s head whipped round and faced the guardsman who had entered the ward; armour on and fully equipped.
‘Ladies and gentlemen, it’s necessary that you evacuate the monastery into the back gardens immediately,’ announced the guardsman.
‘Evacuate? Why?’ Sue repeated.
‘Incoming Solian Battalion. We need to move all civilians out of the area. We have to get you on the next ship when it arrives,’ said the guardsman, ‘and we don’t have much ti-‘
CRASH!
Dust flittered from the ceiling and the ground wobbled. The chandelier above shook.
‘Run!’ cried out Paulo.
He with Jasmine and David close behind dashed past the guardsman. The guardsman followed them and after came the rest of the company.
Another crash came, shaking the foundations, causing a mass rabble to emit from the fields outside. Mike was skipping steps, holding Daisy’s hand to keep her close. Sue was running behind them, and McCain was last in line, hopping on his stick as they ran in front.
Mike stopped dead in his tracks.
‘Lucy!’ he shouted, and dropped Daisy’s hand running up the stairs. Daisy called out, ‘Mike!’ but Sue pushed her ahead.
‘He’ll be alright. We need to go!’ Sue said.
Mike zoomed past McCain, ruffling his cloak. He jumped up the stairs as a large boulder crashed down the corridor he’d just ducked out of. The ceiling collapsed behind him, dropping stones and a chair onto the staircase. He slid across the next corridor, round a corner and into the second room.
There was Lucy, lying unconscious still. Mike glanced over her, working out the right way to pick her up, but realising there wasn’t time to be polite, he thrust his arms underneath her neck and knees, lifted her off the bed and ran back the other way.
Now a boulder ran straight through the corridor in front of him, creating a hole in the wall, causing the consequent collapse of the ceiling and room above it and blocking his path. He whisked the other way around, and ran down the next corridor, not paying attention to Lucy’s bouncing and bucking as he ran recklessly.
He found another staircase, and jumped down most of it, almost tripping, but kept his balance using Lucy. He took a right and found a window. A quick glimpse through the window revealed that the field was now being assaulted by a large army of sorts, with catapults lining its backline defence. All blue armour, like an ocean of swords.
Mike found that the next staircase was now half broken. Taking a running chance, and since he had no time, he leapt with most his might across. He managed to make it, with room to spare, but he lost his balance and fell flat on his back. He groaned in aching pain, and pulled himself back up, still holding Lucy.
He had reached the ground floor. Now he just needed to get to the back, right? A few more corners of rumbling and crashing, and he finally found the open doors to the outside. And when he ran out into the debris ridden grass, he slowed down in front of the magnificent object sitting before him.
A machine, that could’ve been associated with a rocket, was sitting on the grass, rumbling. Even as more boulders crashed around the field, Mike was astounded and confused by the vehicle with long peaked nose and three rocket jets at the end that howled. And a small ramp, folded out from a doorway, led the way inside of it.
‘Get in you fool!’ shouted the doorman, who had been waiting for Mike. Mike sprinted up the ramp and inside the thing with Lucy, and he found himself exhausted and coughing heavily. The dust was affecting his lungs. He almost collapsed, but knowing Lucy was still in his arms, he made himself keep upright.
‘Take her down the corridor there! Hurry! We’ve got to get out of here now!’ shouted the doorman, pulling up the ramp and pointing vaguely up the narrow path on the right.
Inside the rocket, it was furnished similar to the stereotypical submarine. The rivets holding the plates together were very visible and there were seats all around the first room, each with straps and bars to hold whoever sat in them in place. Down the corridor, there was another similar room with the company all in a seat each. All around were a few other men and women and children. As Mike stepped in, an attendant saw him and gasped.
‘My goodness, let me help you!’ she said, ‘I’ll put her in the medical office. You take a seat here’.
She slowly took Lucy off Mike. He felt so tired, he almost dropped her into the attendants arms. The attendant gave an assuring smile to him, and took him further on down the machine.
‘Mike, don’t do that ever again!’ yelled Daisy, and out of nowhere, pushing him.
‘What?’ exclaimed Mike.
‘Just running off like that! We were worried you could have been killed or-‘
‘It’s just a game! Why are you getting so upset?’ argued Mike.
‘A game!? Why did you run back for Lucy!?’ shouted Daisy.
Mike stopped, and his face fell. He understood. Daisy looked so angry, but she was crying so hard she couldn’t hold it back well enough, and what appeared on her face were the rivers of tears being directed all over by her screwed up anger.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said, hugging Daisy, as she began to cough on her tears.
‘You – you could’ve-‘ she tried to say.
This game was having too much of an affect already. Realism wasn’t the best thing.
‘Everyone take your seats and hold on! We’re getting out of here!’ yelled an attendant from up the craft. Mike led Daisy to her seat and they sat down. She continually wiped her eyes to stop crying. Mike glanced at everyone and glared at their stares. Paulo coughed and tried getting into a conversation with the others to draw away attention from Daisy.
‘So…now what?’ was the first thing that came out.
‘We’re in a “thing”, going “somewhere”,’ explained David.
‘So nothing is the answer,’ said Paulo.
‘I bet there’ll be something for us when we land. New NPC!’ said Jasmine.
‘Well they can’t leave us clueless on the first part of the game, can they?’ said Sue.
And at that precise moment, another attendant came into the section of the craft and called out, ‘I have something here for a company affiliated with Lucifer. Anyone know a Lucifer?’
None of the other civilians in the sector made any motion. Sue looked around the section oddly before she awkwardly raised her hand up halfway. The attendant passed her a large book with a note pinned to it. It was a relatively-new, hand-made book with straps and a hardcover. The note was written on parchment in calligraphy…with the ‘i’s dotted with hearts.
‘”Game Mechanics – Page 127” – “The World of Science: A Rendition of the Classic Disputes of the House of Masters”,’ Sue read from the note and book.
‘I have no idea whether that’s going to make things easier, or more complicated,’ said Paulo.
---
One annoying thing here; I'm combining three things very awkwardly, generating all sorts of conflictions, condradictions and explanations. Don't understand what something is? Tough. Unless it can be explained in the moment, it won't be explained. And that is the greatest flaw to overcome in fantasy writing.
- #61
- 29 March 2011 - 10:06 PM
So this turned from a fantasy story to a sci-fi fantasy story o.O Meh alright. I don't mind just caught me off guard there for a sec.
- #62
- 29 March 2011 - 10:20 PM




